


A Teme's Guide to Coffee Crushes

by queenofslytherin14



Category: Naruto
Genre: But this story is still living, Duck Ass hair, F/M, Fem! Naruto is still Naruto, Fugaku Uchiha's A+ Parenting, Gaara is a BOSS, Kiba is a snapchat stalker, M/M, Naruto is Just Naruto, Sakura is Itachi's partner in crime, Sasuke is a coffee dumping bastard, Sasuke sucks with feelings, The author is lazy, Uchihas are a jealous bunch, Way Too Many Tags, and doesnt update fast, he tries though, hinata is awesome, slowburn, too many tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-01-10 23:47:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12310431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenofslytherin14/pseuds/queenofslytherin14
Summary: Sasuke believes you can tell someone's personality by their favorite drink. Caramel Macchiato with extra whipped cream, and a tablespoon of caramel, Sasuke knows that idiot's regular like his own name. Too sweet for his bitter self, warm, and the order is absolutely infuriating. Naruto Uzumaki in a cup, and Sasuke's bitter taste, is unknowingly, unwillingly, learning to love it.





	1. Contracts are only suggestions

Somewhere in a generic big city, the kind where strangers huddle, unconsciously trying to keep themselves warm until the crosslight changes, where billboards with flashing lights, advertise women putting on skin care products line every corner, drivers hang out their windows yelling in less than polite terms about that one idiot holding up traffic, there’s a coffee shop.

To be quite blunt, there absolutely nothing special about it. However, if you asked anyone who’d ever been there they would quickly assure you that, yes, it was the best coffee place in the city and no they had no plans of getting their coffee fix anywhere else. College students and business people made up most of the cafe’s visitors.  Students were attracted by the free Wifi, long hours (6 am- 12 pm) for the night before a paper was due, strong shots of caffeine to keep them awake, and the hot stuff.

And they weren’t talking about the coffee.

Konoha Coffee was in possession of the one thing that made every other place in the city turn green with envy ( several places actually had an unspoken rule that Konoha may not be uttered inside their establishments), and made prospective customers deemed them inadequate, especially for the female population. That one thing would be a black haired barista by the name of Sasuke Uchiha.

Throughout his 19 years of existence, Sasuke had gotten used to flattering adjectives, if anything he knew he was attractive, and by this point, it was simply a fact of life.

The sky is blue.

The Sun is nearly as hot as himself.

Tomatoes are the only food worth eating.

And the devil takes the form of loud-mouthed blue eyed blonde haired college students.

Each and every one has been proven multiple times over.

Sasuke didn’t have the best attitude, he knew it. His fangirls knew it (” he was so mysterious  and hot and O! M! G! Can you imagine him smiling at me, cue the coy smile, we’re going out you know, he’s just shy about it”-  
” Nu uh I know you just didn’t try and take my man Bi-ya-tch”, cue the catfight and the uninterested,” Hn”.), the customers knew it (they didn’t really care, all they cared about was he made damn good coffee), hell, even Pottermore knew it, when he finished the Patronus quiz his result: the freaking Grumpy Cat himself.

It was accepted that you ordered your drink as quickly as possible and exited his personal space immediately, whether that meant going about the rest of your day or grabbing a table pretending to be looking at the menu with fellow fangirls while giggling. Apparently the menu was freaking hilarious because somehow it went on all day and managed to be louder than the shitty, overplayed pop music Sasuke hated.

Why he even had this job, he still wasn’t sure. One minute (more like 1 year) ago, there he was fresh out of Uni, graduated with his Masters in Business, assured of his position at the family company starting off somewhere low as manager of something.

The next, his mother was springing on him that she had this friend, whose daughter’s godmother had this cafe that was looking for a good-looking, young, male barista. She apparently thought it would be great opportunity to help him be an empathic boss to his future subordinates since he had once been one, and when Mikoto Uchiha wanted something she got it.

Slytherin through and through that one, and soon Fugaku was agreeing that, _yes that was a wonderful idea and you can work there for 2 years Sasuke, use the time you’d have been in college for some real world experience…._ -yadayadayada talktalktalk- _….20th birthday_ ….- yadayada- _...teach responsibility_ ….-yada _-...do not shame the Uchiha name._

Hn.

Yeah right, he didn’t see Itachi in an apron, dealing with customers that didn’t know the difference between a frappuccino and a cappuccino. And even worse girls that refused to understand that, _this was an establishment **that** **sold things** , and if you weren’t going to buy anything you need to get your sorry asses out before we call the **damn police** , buy something or practice kissing the pavement._

Which brought him to this moment, standing outside of his manager’s office, hand poised to knock on the black door, whose paint was slowly chipped in the place that would be hand level for most people.Sasuke suspected it was from previous employees, who had been unfortunate enough to be chosen as sacrifice for the figurative altar, sent to appease (more like distract) the manager, a busty blond named Tsunade Senju, while she was in one of her moods. Which was pretty anytime she was actually reminded that being a manager had responsibilities that came with the title.

Namely doing paperwork, not gambling away the emergency money stash, and the fact that drinking on the job was totally unacceptable regardless of whether it was from a bottle or disguised as a to go cup of coffee.

The only reason Konoha was still open was thanks to her personal assistant- more like slave with all the work she did- Shizune, who managed to keep the shop up to date with paperwork, out of debt, and somewhat reduce how much alcohol was consumed by Tsunade to the point where her liver wouldn’t deteriorate the instant a drop touched her mouth. A Herculean feat if he’d ever saw one.

Turning the slightly cool metal knob, he pushed the door open. The cafe had 2 levels, the bottom one was occupied by customers and the top housed Tsunade’s apartment, and office.

Huge windows lined the room and let the gray light of cloudy skies shine through giving the room an eerie, haunting shine. A desk with 6 stacks of overdue papers and tax returns stood a good foot high each , and only served to frame the person who sat in a swivel chair, back face him. A black silhouette greeted him, and out of his view the figure was crossing her legs and folding her hands over one knee, in a dramatic fashion not unlike the way a mafia boss would sit.

Sasuke rolled his obsidian eyes that failed to be seen in the dimly lit room.

 _Kami_ _give him patience, dramatic bosses were not in the job description. Then again he didn’t exactly get a description. Or a choice._

After several long moments of silence, Tsunade finally spoke,

“Uchiha...do you know why you’re here?”

“No.” He said bluntly.

The chair turned around.

“Shizune, lights.”

“Right away milady.” A voice came from somewhere behind him, and though he would never admit it, Sasuke was startled that she managed to go undetected by his usually acute senses.

With the flip of a switch the space was flooded with LED light shining on already pale skin, making him seem a translucent ghost.

Raising her “coffee” cup to her lips she took a long sip, honey-brown eyes staring over the brim, regarding the person in front of her.

The Uchiha boy was the youngest employee she had. Yet with only a year of experience, he was easily the best worker in the cafe. Spotless attendance record, independent thinker, made the best damn coffee she’d ever had when she bothered to drink it. (And as an added bonus his looks were a huge business booster).

The perfect employee, by anyone’s standards, or as close to perfect as you can get because everyone had their flaws. Sasuke, well.... he didn’t waste any effort concealing his. His personality could definitely use a complete makeover. He would win friendliest person of the year award when she joined the Alcoholics Anonymous and gave up drinking.

Tsunade held back a snort.

_So never then._

However in this case the brat’s personality was exactly why she picked him for this task. The no-shit attitude he turned on uppity customers would hopefully be exactly what was need to deal with what she was about to unload on this poor kid.

Besides Naruto always managed to make people like her in the end, and Tsunade had no reason to believe this would be any different.

Her mind cleared of any lingering doubts (and guilt) she may have had, she set down her cup and spoke.

“ Let’s cut to the chase. You and I both know you’re the best Konoha has, and that’s why I’m entrusting this task to you.”

She paused.

“ My goddaughter is going to start working here, she’s around your age. Since you’re my best, you’re her new trainer and mentor. I’m holding you responsible for her. This is not a request.”

Those last words came out steely, a vast difference from usually laid-back attitude. She was serious about this.

Sasuke scoffed. Well so was he. There was no way in hell he was doing this.

“You want me to be a glorified babysitter? My contract had nothing like that in the terms.” He glared coldly at his boss.

“You know why I’m here,” his index finger raised,” 1 more year and I’m done with these training wheels and my life can finally begin. Here’s the deal: I make drinks, countdown the days, and you leave me the hell alone.”

Tsunade smirked at the outburst.

“I had a feeling you might say that and that’s why I have this.”  
She dug through a pile of papers before she found the one she wanted, holding it up victoriously.

Sasuke recognized it as the contract he signed.

There was a glint in her eyes, that gave him the feeling he wasn’t going to like what she was about to do.

Boy was he right.

Grasping the paper in her hands, Tsunade cleanly ripped it in half, successfully terminating the previous contract in a less than legal way. Carelessly tossing the halves back onto her desk, she said smugly,

“ Your contract is no longer an issue. Besides, I have a feeling you might like the new one better.”

There was only one thing Sasuke wanted that could convince him to agree to this stupid assignment, so was she…?

A new contract was pushed forwards, and Sasuke snatched of the desk, quickly flipping through it until his eyes found what they were looking for.  
Never mind what he’d said. This was worth playing nanny for a couple months.

“Agreed.” He said,

“When do I start?”


	2. "Sasuke the Snowman was a very grumpy man...."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First impressions are long-lasting. 
> 
> Or,
> 
> Naruto meets Sasuke.

 

 His freedom was _not_ worth this shit smear to his pride.

 

_Damn it. Damnit. DAMNIT!_

 

Whipped cream was sprayed on top of a toffee colored drink, rising a lopsided white peak inside the black cup.

 

Lopsided.

 

Sasuke gripped the burning cup, glaring at it as if it was the cause of his awful mood. That incline was _mocking_ him, tilting ever so slightly, drooping to meet clenched slender fingers-

 

Stupid drink, it deserved to be pitched. Sasuke tossed the disappointing drink into the stainless steel sink, watching the liquid swirl down the drain with a sense of satisfaction.

 

 _Start from scratch, that’s it._ A pale hand reached for a black paper cup, pulling the 2% milk out of the fridge, footsteps walking the familiar path to the coffee station, measuring out the coffee bea-

 

“Excuse me Duck Ass,”a feminine voice rang out, interrupting Sasuke’s calming self-made rhythm. Rich, dark chocolate colored beans fell like raindrops out of the scoop. Unintentionally, his eyes watched their fall, bouncing across the tan and black tile floors before they slowed to a stop.

 

_What a waste of beans._

 

Behind the counter stood, a short blonde woman in eye achingly orange clothes, an annoyed frown on her face.

 

“That was a perfect drink right there and you just chucked it. 360 ¥ just went down that drain, and I’m broke alright-”

 

It was at this point Sasuke started to zone out, her irrelevant complaints flying over his head.

 

This was just the cherry on top of his shitty week sundae, wasn’t it. A week that started with him signing that thrice damned contract (he regretted it almost immediately), and ended with this customer and her too loud mouth. _Did she ever shut up!?_ Words blurred into one continuous one, flowing out of her mouth like water out of a leaky, broken faucet, seemingly unending.

 

That was, so to speak, the straw that broke the camel's back. Also known as the thing that made Sasuke’s control snap and take out all of his annoyance on who he thought was a convenient target- that loud mouthed blonde bimbo.

 

“Oi. Bastard,” That voice sounded like it came from a nearer proximity than earlier. And it sounded darker.

 

His piercing, black eyes narrowed.

 

Hell was about to break loose.

 

__________________________________________________________________

 

Naruto was having a good day.

She’d just convinced (read: blackmailed) her political science professor, Iruka, to take her out to the best food cart in the city, Ichiraku Ramen. She caught him in a passionate embrace with her (practically) older brother Kakashi. Kakashi just stared at her boredly, and Iruka begged her not to tell. He knew she wouldn’t, but he bought her ramen anyway.

 

Naruto walked away feeling satisfied and her stomach, pleasantly warm after 4 (or so) bowls of miso ramen and Iruka’s empty wallet.

 

She decided to walk to her apartment, which was nestled in a lively, vibrant  corner of downtown. It was midway through her senior year of high school that Naruto decided that she wanted to live alone and go to university in a different city. It was about 45 minutes from her childhood home.

 

Of course there were other options- her parents, Minato and Kushina, wanted her to continue living at home, and there was always the option of living on campus.

 

But no, Naruto Uzumaki wanted to prove that she could take care of herself  and be **damn** ** _good_** at it, believe it! ( Her place was a mess, ramen cups strewn everywhere, piles of dirty clothes as tall as her just begging to be cleaned, and orange fox fur on everything from her beloved companion, Kurama. Cleanliness is in the eye of the beholder, eh?)

 

Naruto wrapped her jacket around her slim, 5’5 form, her mid-back length hair whipping past her face obscuring her vision. As she continued down the gray cobblestone sidewalk, the young woman soaked up the sun and enjoyed the last of the nice weather. She could feel it in the air, the subtle shift of seasons, that whiff of matured leaves near the end of their life, a last hurrah turning them into a show of breathtaking colors. The wind was starting to gain an edge, crisper, cooler, and more powerful.

 

A bone chilling gust blew just then, making her teeth clench and goosebumps to rise.

“I shoulda brought a warmer jacket.” Naruto grumbled out loud.

 

 _Or,_ the voice in her head said, _you could get a nice,_ **_hot_ ** _drink from that conveniently placed cafe there._

 

Hmm, that was a smart idea actually, except for the fact she was a broke college student. For Kami’s sake she’s just swindled her professor into buying her lunch. Also there was the fact her best friends, Kiba, Sakura and Shikamaru (Ino couldn’t make it, she had a shift at the family flower shop) , cleaned her pockets out yesterday during their impromptu test-passing celebration at the arcade yesterday. And damn what a celebration it was, she _really_ didn’t want to see her bank account.

 

Her legs carried her to the front of a cafe, her hands rummaged in her pockets pulling out anything felt even remotely like cash. _It was kinda like going fishing,_ she thought, _she might get something she might not._

 

That was deep, she should totally write that down. Prove to Kiba she actually _could_ think of deep things. _Too bad her pockets weren’t_ , Naruto thought longingly, looking at the pitiful catch she pulled out: 5 faded gum wrappers, a business card from her father’s campaign for Prime Minister of Konoha from a year ago, 4 Ichiraku coupons (smuggled to her courtesy of Ayame) good for a bowl each. And,

 

“600 yen*, YES! I got enough! Caramel macchiato, here I come. Believe it!”

 

Holding the money up victoriously, the blonde broke out into an impromptu happy dance. She ignored the judging looks she received.

 _Screw them, not everyone could be as_ **_awesome_ ** _as her._

 

From her current place in front of the door she could clearly read the name of the cafe, _Konoha Coffee_. Naruto smiled, that old grandma actually went and made a coffee shop. She still couldn’t believe it even after baa-chan called her up about a week ago, saying she needed more employees and asked if she wanted a job at her cafe.

 

Of course Naruto jumped at the opportunity...okay, only after she heard that employees get free drinks, but still baa-chan needed help and Naruto would do everything in her power make sure her godmother had it.

 

She started in 2 days.

 

 _Perfect,_ she thought grasping the smooth handle and being greeted with warm cookie scented air, an unseen bell cheerfully announcing her arrival. _She’d grab a drink and go see the old woman._ It had been too long since she’d seen her anyway.

 

Making her way to the line she noted the patrons.

 

A couple businessmen sat tapping the keys on their laptops furiously, occasionally grabbing their mugs and taking a long, aggressive sip, before returning to their screen.

 

Couples sat across from each other, one couple sat awkwardly as if it was their first date. The man, kept clearing his throat as if he didn’t know what to say, and the woman twirled her brown hair around her finger, eyes glancing up to meet his, then dropping when eye contact was made, a dark red blush blossoming on her fair cheeks.  

 

The majority though, looked to be 20ish year old girls, crowded around tables, in packs of 7-8, heads close together whispering and giggling, something behind the counter holding their attention.

 

They look like hungry vultures from that savannah documentary Kiba showed her, watching  their prey, waiting for an opening and then...then they would strike. She shuddered, remembering the way the vultures fought over a lion carcass. Just hours before, the proud beast had its head raised high, flaxen mane blowing gently, assured of its place in the world.   

 

_How the mighty fall._

 

Naruto followed their gaze, but a long line concealed whatever it was that was capturing their attention. She shrugged it off, checking out the menu as she waited. Quickly her eyes located her go-to drink, a caramel macchiato, and its price, 360￥. Her selection chosen, she pulled out her phone.

 

_You have 3 new messages._

Hmm, from who?

 

Opening her conversations, she read a message from Kiba.

 

_DUDE! Why didn’t u tell me how hot ur friend was?!_

 

Fingers quickly texting back, she replied,

 

_Who? Didn’t think anyone I knew was ur type._

 

The response was fast.

 

_The one with the black hair and really pale gray eyes, in ur snapchat story. She’s GORGEOUS!! What’s her name and number?_

 

 _Wow Kiba didn’t know you were a stalker_ , the blonde rolled her eyes.

 

_I’m going to give u a sec to realize how that sounded. Creep. Her name’s Hinata and she’s more than just a pretty face, got that? I refuse to give you any more info until you actually meet her._

 

Kiba sent a meme worthy face.

 _So you’re going to set me up? Thanks I knew there was a reason I put up with u._ **:)**

 

Naruto swore that kid had selective hearing. Or selective reading, whatever.

 _Pretty sure it’s the other way around dog breath, I put up with_ _you_ . _And slow those horses down I said u 2 cld meet. You can tag around next time we hang out. Take it or leave it._

 

“Say your goddamn order already.” An elderly man standing behind her grumbled, mumbling something about youngins and their obsession with their devices.

 

“Like you actually have anywhere to be, you’re probably retired.” She snarked quietly to herself.

 

“Hi, I’ll take a medium caramel macchiato, extra caramel and whipped cream please.” The blonde smiled warmly to the cashier behind the register, a woman, with 2 buns on either side of her head. Her name tag read, _Tenten._

 

She smiled back and called out to the barista in the back, “One medium Caramel Macchiato, extra caramel, extra whipped cream.”

 

Now she saw what those girls had been looking at- the barista.

 

She honestly didn’t see what was so special about him.

 

He had black hair, with bangs and from her point of view the back looked like a duck’s ass. Though, _damn that skin was pale._ He kinda looked like..like..like a snowman.

 

_Yes, a snowman._

 

He seemed cold and frigid. A dark cloud seemed to float above his head, and he seemed to be in a bad mood based on his sharp movements and tensed body.

 

What did those girls see in him that made their primal side come out?

 

She didn’t know.

 

For a while she made small talk with Tenten.

 

Then, out the corner of her eye she saw Duck Ass gripping her beloved drink, stare at it for a moment then, a horrible injustice occurred.

 

He _dumped_ it.

 

As she watched in horror, time seemed to freeze, and in slow motion the caramel liquid poured, spiraling down, down, down the drain.

Time sped back up.

 

 _Nooooo,_ her face hardened, _Duck Ass I re-dub thee teme**._

 

Speaking with the flames of Tartarus lacing her words, she all but growled.

 

“Excuse me Duck Ass,”

 

He didn’t turn around.

 

Tenten’s eyes widened, but she remained quiet.

 

Mothers covered their children's ears and the cafe went silent.

 

“That was a perfect drink right there and you just chucked it. 360 ¥ just went down that drain, and I’m broke alright. I don’t have that money to waste so that drink better be free. Are you even listening to me!?” Naruto was getting angrier by the second and Duck Ass’s silence wasn’t helping.

 

 _How_ **_DARE_ ** _he!_ **_Nobody_ ** _ignored Naruto Uzumaki, that rude bastard was going to rue the day he messed up her order._

 

After a few moments of discomforting quiet, the proverbial shit hit the fan.

 

Turning sorrowfully to Tenten she said solemnly, “ I truly am sorry okay?”

 

Pushing through the employee entrance (she was going to be one in a matter of days right?) she strode over to the bastard and stood behind him, fists on hips.

 

People who were there that day swore that her blue eyes turned a blood red, her nails grew an inch, her hair morphed into nine tails, and an aura of killing intent surrounded her.

 

“Oi. Bastard.” Naruto spat.

 

This time he turned around.

  
  
  
  


* Japanese currency, around $5.33 USD

** Naruto calls Sasuke this. It means You! in a really angry or rude way, like how you would say a curse word. At least that what google says, if that’s wrong just tell me in the comments please, so I know...I’ve always thought it was bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the great feedback last chapter, so much more than I expected. I was going to post earlier today, but I was out buying furniture and stuff for my new apartment. Also I have A Teme's Guide up on FF.net if you awesome readers want to go and check that out (hint, hint maybe follow, favorite, review?). I generally post faster on there so updates are more frequent, if not, at least faster. Same profile name, same story name. Also would anyone be interested in being a Beta for this, I'd like 2 maybe? Comment or send me a message on either sites if you're interested. 
> 
> -Slytherin


	3. Okay ladies, now let's get in formation!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke is a human shield.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Yo yo yo, happy holidays! So, it’ s been months I know, and I honestly don’t have anything to say. I’m very bad at updating it seems (read: lazy), but have faith! I might update slow but I haven’t forgotten you guys! Though winter break just started, so I’ve got nothing to do but write. At the very least there should be one more update for this story. Also (shameless self promotion) if you haven’t checked out my ItaSaku Hearts Wide Open you should. Who knows the worst that could happen is you like it. Besides, I’m planning to have 2 chapters up in the next month! Whooo!! Hope you enjoy, and don’t forget to review to tell me your thoughts! Constructive criticism is appreciated.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I just write this for fun.  
> Dedicated to the user who motivated me to get this up : pooKie420. Thanks!

* * *

  
  


Naruto liked to think this wasn’t her. 

 

That she didn’t have it in her to flip out at a random worker who  _ just _ happened to dump her drink. But apparently she did, and it was like she couldn’t even think clearly.

 

Besides, even if she was in the wrong, it looked like Duck Ass was taking out whatever angst he had, out on her warm, sweet, caramel-y, heaven-sent drink, that should be praised for all of eternit-.

 

That train of thought had just derailed, crashed, and burned in a fiery inferno. 

 

_ Okay, _ moving on.

 

Even before her father had taken office and become Hokage, he’d wanted Naruto to be conscious of the hardships of others less fortunate than herself.  So around when she was 7, the Uzumaki-Namikazes went on a couple years long service mission to Ame. 

 

The history of Ame is an unfortunate one. 

 

Their downfall started with 2 nations.

 

Suna and Iwa. 

 

Suna fighting to bring justice down upon the murderer of their third Prime Minister, and Iwa to redirect the finger being pointed at them. Konoha was quick to rush to the aid of its ally Suna and thus fighting on 3 sides began.

 

Ame was caught between the brutal force of 3 powerful nations, all three willing to do whatever was necessary in order to avenge the wrongs that had been committed against them and their ally. 

 

All of them forgot about the small nation caught in the middle of it all, being devastated on all sides. As the war (which would later be called the Third Great War) raged on, poor Ame fell deeper and deeper into poverty and instability and  its’ citizens suffered for it. The result after the dust had settled and the blood pools dried up?

 

Ame was left a pale shadow of the nation it once was, dying and neglected.  

 

After the war Naruto’s father, Minato Namikaze, formerly First Lieutenant, was promoted and given the title of Sergeant Major of Army because of his vital role in the war, (some believed it was _ because  _ of him Suna and Konoha won). “The Yellow Flash” was how he was known throughout the world, for his shock of yellow hair and the speed of which he dispatched his enemies, turning him into a yellow blur on the battlefield. 

 

It weighed on him though. 

 

Minato was a soldier, he knew that- knew what was expected of him, knew what he would  _ see  _ and  _ do  _ in the name of his country and the people he swore to protect. But the knowledge of the deaths he had caused, indirectly and directly, still kept him up at night. 

 

During the war, sleep evaded him, leaving his bright blue eyes dark and clouded, with nothing to do but stare up at the grimy tent ceiling above. Lying there reliving the day over and over again, gunshots ringing outside. The sound was somewhat distant but to a battle sharpened soldier, it might as well have been right next to him.

 

In the morning though, he’d have to lock it away. As soon as he lifted the dirt-streaked canvas flap of his tent, no one would ever know that this firm, battle-hardened man was the same person who wrote tear-stained letters every night to his wife and daughter, that he knew he would never send.

It eased the burden somewhat, putting into words how much he missed them. How he couldn’t promise that, only tomorrow they wouldn’t hear a knock on their door, opening it to find a solemn man dressed neatly in military gear you could tell had never been used, hat respectfully off and head bowed, glancing up to meet eyes that pleaded for some kind of mistake. Naruto, _ his little baby girl,  _ clutching Kushina’s leg and taking in the first time she had ever seen  _ fear _ on her strong mother’s face. 

 

No, as soon as the dawn rose pink, and the hellish nightmare began once again, that man disappeared- it would do no good for his subordinates (or enemies) to see anything that could be equated to weakness. 

 

_ Rule #17 of war: A soldier must never show any weakness. _

 

Especially from a leader.

  
  


After the war was different, though.

 

Minato filed his request for a couple years of military leave in an attempt to salvage what was left of his conscious and avoid falling prey to survivor’s guilt and PTSD. Of course they said yes with his record and the fact that, now every nation had issued a flee on sight order (making him their most powerful military personnel) may have helped.

 

He never told anyone what he’d seen or done but he thought Kushina understood- after all they’d met in Military Academy. She understood his need to get away from it all for a while, and so she’d suggested moving to Ame for a couple years. 

 

_ Think of it as atoning for the lives,  _ she’d said,  _ people suffered in that war, but the people of Ame shouldn’t have to. _

 

And so they’d moved, buying a small cottage on the outskirts of Ame’s capital,  Amegakure. They lived humbly for a couple years, living off military grants and Kushina’s inventive business of bottling water from Ame’s magnitude of wells, and selling it to other nations. She called it “ Tenu Mizu”, ( 天の水)  or “Water of the heavens.”

 

It sold well becoming a staple in wealthier communities, the new “Perrier” it was called, and they used the profits to help rebuild, buy food, fund housing projects. Minato and Kushina also worked as a link between the established Konoha government and the rebuilding Ame government. Kushina was the one who worked out trades between Konoha, Ame and a reluctant Suna.

 

_ The redhead sat with her legs crossed, one hand laying on top of her knee, a couple inches above the hemline of her tan shorts. She was engaged in a staring contest with the current Kazekage, the Prime Minister of Suna, who was resolutely glaring back. _

 

_ Finally the fourth Kazekage spoke, his voice low and rumbling, _

_ “Why have you called me here, wife of the Yellow Flash.” _

 

_ Her face was marred by the deep frown that was etched on it, _

 

_ “Now, now Kazekage-sama, I’ll be addressed by my title, the accomplishments of my husband have nothing to do with this conversation- it’s First Sergeant Uzumaki just in case you weren’t sure.” _

 

_ She was giving him an out, and her eyes glimmered daring him to say otherwise, “I may be off-call, but my position still remains. And with all due respect Kazekage-sama, you know  _ **_exactly_ ** _ why we’re here,” she paused,  _

 

_ “To pay Suna’s debt back to Ame.” _

 

_ Throughout her statement he’d been silent, but the last part evoked a reaction from him. _

 

_“Suna owes_ ** _nothing_** _to Ame. You’d do well to remember who you are talking to.” he roared._

 

_ Kushina’s eyes flashed and her polite tone turned cold.  _

 

_ “Kazekage- _ **_sama_ ** _ ,  it is _ **_because_ ** _ of Suna and Iwa ’s war that Ame is in ruins. Both destroyed the country and as such, both should support Ame at its weakest,” her voice was firm and her body language screamed confidence. This was woman with a cause, and she would not be denied.  _

 

_ “That may be so, but Suna’s priorities are that of its’ own people. The war took a toll on all sides involved; our only focus is securing Suna and making sure supplies are readily available.”  _

 

_ A knowing smirk danced across her face. _

 

_ “Kazekage-sama, that’s exactly what I’m proposing. A trade involving Suna and Ame. As you know, Ame has a surplus of water and all the agricultural space needed to produce enough food for both its’ citizens and Suna’s. The people of Ame sent me to offer this deal:  _

_ They are willing to trade water and food in exchange for security and help rebuilding property.” _

 

_ Her blue-gray eyes sparkled. _

 

_ “So, what say you Kazekage-sama?” _

 

With a little bit of persuasion, both parties came to terms and a deal was established. It was a little while after that when things started to look up for Ame. Having a purpose gave them drive and restored their faith in starting anew. Minato felt his debt had been paid off some and the time was right to return home, and that was the end of the Ame chapter of Naruto’s life.

  
  
  


Naruto’s anger was a red smog that seemed to consume her. She always had a bit of a temper but this- this literally took the cake for being the stupidest reason for getting mad  _ ever. _ She couldn’t seem to break free and over what? Her goddamn latte. 

 

That thought cleared her mind and she exhaled. The sounds of the once-vibrant and buzzing cafe, people chatting, keyboards clacking, machines whizzing and whirring, the sounds of people’s caffeine needs being met, were silent. 

 

_ Why’s everyone so freaking quiet? _

 

A flat voice startled her out of her thoughts, which she must’ve voiced, “Because of you, idiot.”.

 

In front of her stood the barista himself, a clean black apron tied around his waist, mouth scowling and hair hanging over disapproving eyes. 

 

“You do realize only employees are allowed behind the counter.” A pale finger pointed towards a white sign with red words, “It’s not like there’s not a sign _right there_ that says, _surprise,_ only employees are allowed behind the counter.” 

 

He spoke as if he was trying to explain gravity to an airbender, and Naruto could hear the sarcasm practically oozing from his words. 

 

“No shit Sherlock. I saw it, but  _ obviously, _ ” she dragged the word out, “If I’m back here that means I don’t care.” Naruto said bluntly.

 

Duck Ass shifted, leaning against the counter with the coffee scoop still dangling  in his hand, as if trying to make himself more comfortable among the flour bags. Naruto hoped it fell on his gelled head, then it would finish off the ghost look he had going.

 

Barista guy looked straight into her eyes, lips twisted in a wry smirk.

 

“You have no respect for anyone, do you?”

 

“I do!” she muttered under her breath, “Just not for you.”

 

It wasn’t her fault, the afternoon flashed through her mind, er, maybe it was, but she just wanted caffeine. Seriously. 

 

But, she couldn’t say _that,_ so it translated into, “I just wanted a little professionalism **and** ” she emphasized the word, “anyone with eyes could see you were in a bad mood, that doesn’t mean you nitpick at someone else’s drink. Or waste a perfectly edible item, teme.”.

 

Sasuke scowled. This idiot’s logic made zero sense. 

 

_ Professionalism  _ was her excuse? You’d gotta be shitting him. Arguing with her was supposed to let off some steam- not build more, but right now he felt like a freaking tea kettle. _ But _ , he supposed,  _ he couldn’t have expected a battle of wits with a dobe who quite obviously, wasn’t even armed _ . 

 

Mentally he sighed. 

 

He’d thought this one might be fun.  No matter- time to end this.

 

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave, you’re disturbing the customers,” her mouth opened, about to protest but he stopped her with a glare and jabbed his finger towards the entrance door, “and if you refuse to cooperate, then I’m going to have to call the police.” 

 

So much for a calm afternoon, or, whatever time was left of it, she didn’t want to spend it in a jail cell. She messed up and she could admit it. . . just not to this teme.

 

Turning around, and walking towards the middle of the room to face the cafe, she held her hands together and bowed her head, blonde hair falling in from of her eyes and hanging around her head like a curtain. 

 

“ I reacted inappropriately and I didn’t respect your right to a peaceful afternoon and for that I am sorry ,  sumimasen. Please accept my regrets.” 

 

Peeking a blue eye open, she took in the sight of people with mixed reactions on their faces. 

 

A mother holding her son’s hand smiled gently, understanding not of her actions but of her apology. After all, the boy pulling on her shirt and pointing vehemently at a piece of cake inside the display case, face scrunching with displeasure, she has dealt with it before. 

 

The couple was snickering behind their mugs, the man setting his down and in his haste knocking it over. Reaching for a napkin with one hand, he blotted the spill, cursing under his breath at his clumsiness, she definitely wouldn’t like him now. 

 

A hand moved with a crisp white napkin grasped in it, soaking the mess up alongside him. In fascination he watched as the brown liquid spread towards the middle of the paper, almost eating it all. Looking up, warm amber eyes gazed back, framed by severely raven locks, a small smile softening her face. 

 

Relief washed over him and he smiled back, cheeks lifting. The window framing the scene, as they cleaned the mess together, hands holding each other under the table. 

 

Naruto nearly gagged at how sweet it all was.

 

The old man who had commented about the line earlier, had a scowl that eclipsed his entire face, twisting it grotesquely. 

 

“Should’ve tossed you out on your sorry ass, spoiled brat.”

 

Black lightning flashed menacingly, and at least 6 pairs of red eyes shone menacingly, dim light reflecting off pointed teeth. The figures stalked forward, surrounding, causing Naruto to back up.

 

Naruto blinked, and reality sunk back in, revealing the barista’s fangirls surrounding her in a circle. Like a  _ kill _ circle.  __

 

Predators in Prada. 

 

One girl with brown hair in a high ponytail, that swished as she stalked forward, green eyes sizing her up, said practically growling,“How dare you attack our poor Sasuke-kun!” Choruses of “yeahs” echoed through the group. 

 

“Listen vulture ladies-”  _ Whoops, didn’t mean to say that. _

 

Eyes narrowed. 

 

“Get her girls.” With a snap of the leader’s fingers, they charged her and Naruto sighed in her mind. 

 

_ This _ was what apologizing got her- rabid fangirls and an early death. Dammit. 

 

“Some help would be appreciated.” She tossed the comment over her shoulder. 

 

Silence was her response before-

 

A jet of air was expelled from a machine. The whirring of coffee beans grinding and the smell of rich coffee hitting her nose. 

 

They were getting  _ closer. _

 

Suddenly, right next her ear, a bell dinged and the sound rang through her ear canal, lingering longer than the initial sound. 

 

Back pressed against the counter, hands gripping the cool obsidian, the corner of her eye catching a glimpse of a coffee cup with her name written on it in cursive. 

 

_ Fancy bastard. _

 

“One Caramel Macchiato for Naruto.” The barista’s uninterested voice announced, black eyes glinting with amusement at her predicament.

 

She scowled back, and the corners of his mouth twitched in response.

_ Great timing. _

 

Time to make her escape. Her slim fingers swiped the to-go cup and she darted behind the counter again, this time with a different intention. 

 

Her human shield groaned, and cast an angered look over his shoulder. 

 

She grinned sheepishly back in response and took her first sip of her hard fought drink, closing her eyes as the warmth and taste swept over her. 

 

_ So good!  _ She supposed teme knows what he’s doing. She was snapped from her revery by an irritated voice,

 

“Sasuke! What the hell is going on with my cafe, dammit!”

 

Sasuke closed his eyes and sighed. He seemed to be doing that a _ lot _ today. 

 

From the staircase, Tsunade stood, holding her “to-go” cup, green eyes glinting dangerously, looking at the scene in front of her. Her god daughter using her seething, grumpy cat employee as, essentially a meat wall, cornered by legions of his rabid fangirls. 

 

Fan-freaking-tastic. 

 

If she was going to be honest, the blonde was quite amused, but of course she couldn’t let her 2  _ dear  _ workers know that, let them cower for a bit. After all, she was the boss. 

 

Looking at the shorter girl sticking her tongue out at the fangirls from behind the Uchiha, who brushed back his bangs before smirking and turning around, lips forming what was undoubtedly a snide remark, she came to the realization that  _ this  _ was what the next few months were going to look like- a bad rom-com, the kind that required lots of popcorn and  _ lots _ of sake .

 

Sasuke was going to have  _ kittens  _ when he realized Naruto was his new intern.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has anyone seen The Last Jedi? It WAS SO FREAKING GOOD!! Make sure not to write spoilers in the comments for those who haven't seen it.  
> Also I found the best piano music EVER. Check it out you won't regret it I promise. I'm attaching a link for the piano version, the one with lyrics, and a playlist that helps me study, maybe it might help you guys. Will the links work? I don’t know, probably not. 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtkBU3bV0tY
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdYKj2PvnZE
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSOtku1j600


	4. My coffee senses are tingling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto says yes. Sasuke says no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!

**Enjoy! R &R please, it always makes my day! Oh and I’ve got a surprise for you guys…*laughs evilly* it’s at the bottom of the chapter though.**

Naruto felt like she was in grade school again.

 

Back when there were group projects and the teacher paired you up with someone that they probably shouldn’t have, _and then_ they refused to listen to logic and switch partners. It was eerie how similar the situations were now that she thought about it a bit more.

 

“I don’t wanna.” It was childish, she’d admit, but Naruto was not above using such tactics, especially in a situation like this. The betrayal. The _utter_ betrayal of someone she looked up to, of someone she trusted, of someone- just _wow._

 

Just throw her to the wolves why don’t you? Oh wait, even better- throw her to the barista from hell!

 

She was pulled out of her over dramatic thoughts by the annoyed voice of the traitor herself,  “Dammit Naruto! I didn’t ask whether you ‘wanted to’. Sasuke was the best option, so suck it up like an adult and deal with it! You should be glad he was willing to show you the ropes.”

 

Yeah, definitely grade school.

 

A grumble came from the shadows, “I wouldn’t say willing,” Sasuke muttered, mostly to himself, the image of a stapled contract being torn flashing through his mind, but it was heard by the protesting blonde who used the comment to aid her cause.

 

“See! Teme does want to either.”

 

Tsunade rolled her eyes at the woman and a mere second later, turned the wrath in her eyes to him, “Well the Uchiha isn’t exactly in a position where I care if he’s willing.”

 

Sasuke merely arched a brow in response.

 

Naruto was quiet for several moments, silently sorting through her thoughts.

She didn’t want to agree, if only because their first meeting hadn’t exactly gone well, and on another hand he was an asshole. Plain, straight and simple.

 

. . .but even though Tsunade had felt the need to stick tem- her bad _Sasuke-_ with her, she had said she would help out, and she _would_ even if that inevitably meant. . . _him._

 

Mind made up, she determinedly fixed her eyes on the woman sitting behind her desk, and gave a sharp nod. She’d treat this as a mission: help out baa-chan, make some damn good lattes, and turn the bastard less...bastard _-y_.

 

“Good, I’m glad you could see past your differences.” Tsunade sounded proud.

 

Naruto snorted, “Hold the sake, I never said anything like that.”

 

A grunt of agreement sounded from the back, “Hn.”

 

Tsunade sighed, completely and utterly done with this conversation, “...just go make some coffee you two.”

 

* * *

 

 

The afternoon sun was pouring through the glass windows,  complementing the familiar colors of the cafe- turning the floor a warm chocolate and the hanging plants a vibrant green. The cafe was empty, as it was a national holiday, marking the end of the Third World war, save a lone employee wiping down the tables, and a newly minted mentor showing his intern around.

 

A pale hand pointed to a metal piece of equipment, armed with a stainless steel wand, which was currently expelling pressurized bursts of air and in the process making a high pitched whining sound.

 

“This is the foamer,” Sasuke’s voice was dry, “if you can’t tell by the name alone, it foams.”

 

“That. Looks. Awesome.” From behind him, the blonde girl zoomed, practically a blur, hands already reaching out to touch it as she remarked, “Can I try it?!”

 

The Uchiha’s hand rose and chopped downwards, swiftly smacking Naruto’s hand away in one fluid motion, leaving the woman to yelp loudly and clasp the injured hand to her chest. She looked murderously towards him, but surprisingly bit her tongue, satisfying herself with muttering obscenities under her breath.

 

“No.” His eyes were blank, leveled cooly at hers.

 

Like hell he was going to be held responsible when she burned the skin off her hands. Tsunade would probably try to add another month onto his contract. He would say no and then Mikoto would enthusiastically say yes.

 

No, he had the perfect job for her, one that even a _dobe,_ couldn’t screw up,

 

“You can grind the coffee beans.” He pointed towards the far end of the counter where the coffee grinder sat,

 

“What? No! That’s too easy, c’mon!” She argued indignantly, crossing her arms, “I can handle something more advanced, dattebayo!”

 

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, “Fine, show me what a medium grind looks like and we can move on.”

 

Naruto plastered on a confident smile as she made her way over to the machine, measuring out a scoop full of rich chocolate colored beans and pouring them in, “Psshh, medium grind, child’s play.”

 

“Sounds about right then.”  He muttered under his breath.

 

She flashed a bright smile before turning her back towards him, her smile immediately melting away leveling a lost expression at the machine.

 

“Now what the hell is a medium grind?” She hissed to herself.

A big, black dial sat in the middle of the polished stainless steel. So simple yet so foreign. Her coffee machine had buttons on it to select the grind because no one had the energy to contemplate the merits of a fine grind vs an coarse grind first thing in the morning. But it couldn’t be _that_ difficult to figure out.

 

“After all, _Sasuke-teme_ can do it.” She muttered.

 

Famous last words.

 

* * *

 

 

“Order up!” Naruto slid a cup of coffee, emblemed with the Konoha Coffee logo, a loopy “K” and an interlocking “C”, across the table towards the waiting man.

 

Sasuke looked up from his phone, dully eyeing the cup, not saying a word.

 

Naruto’s smile faltered, “Well. . . aren’t you going to drink it?”

 

He sighed, long and experated, black eyes meeting hers, “Did I ask for a drink?”

 

“Don’t be ungrateful teme. Just drink the damn thing.” She huffed.

 

He glared at her for a moment, but Naruto wasn’t fooled by the dark look- she could tell his resolve was weakening (no one was immune to the allure of coffee). When he reached out to grab it she mentally added another tally to her side.

 

_Sasuke: 1 Naruto: 1_

 

Sasuke felt her eyes on him as he took his first sip. The first thing he noticed, with surprise, was it wasn’t overly sweet. In fact, it only had the bare minimum of sugar, just enough to accentuate the robust flavor of the coffee but not enough overpower it and turn it into a cup of sugar- exactly how he liked it.

 

Drawing his lips away from the cup he inhaled softly, savoring the way the earthy aroma curled around his nose.

 

The man took another sip, letting the liquid wash over every inch of his palate, making sure he could assess the brew down to the smallest detail. It was admittedly good- not too weak, but strong enough to make his half-lidded eyes widen as the caffeine started to do its job. All in all, it was a sound first cup and Sasuke really couldn’t find much at fault with it besides the maker.

 

He could tell she was fidgeting, growing antsier with every moment he sat in silence, mouth still on the warm brim, slightly smirking at her discomfort.

 

Finally the blonde gave in and asked the question, just like he knew she would, words spilling out impatiently,“...well? How is it?”

 

Sasuke sighed, “Regardless of how it tastes you didn’t complete the task I gave you.”

 

He fitted his fingers together making a bridge with them and rested them against the lower half of his face, “ But for curiosity's sake, how could you tell how I liked my coffee?”

 

Nobody had ever gotten it right the first time besides Tsunade, but to be fair the woman had been brewing longer than he’d been alive.

 

Apparently he struck people as a “no sugar” type.

 

She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed, “I don’t know...I can just _tell,_ you know?” The woman glanced at him, willing him to understand.

 

Sasuke understood, mainly because he was the same way. It was almost like intuition, and looking at the person only cemented his original hunch.  Whether their preference be coffee or tea, plain or 3 spoons of sugar, decaf or double shot.

 

It wasn’t a superpower or anything, most people just didn’t observe close enough, or hone the talent enough.

 

Maybe she had. Or it could just be coincidence.

 

Either way, she didn’t get off that easily,

 

“ _Do_ I know? Why don’t you use your words.”

 

“Hey! Teme!”

 

Sasuke felt his smirk widen. _Just a little._

  


**AN: Hope you guys like that...I actually had a** **_way_ ** **better ending planned but it was WAY to OOC and cracky to publish so there’s this a nice, un-cracky, actually slow-burn compliant ending… but I didn’t want to leave it like that. You guys may wonder why it takes me so long to write well there’s a couple reasons 1. I’m lazy 2. I have freaking school and I take way too many classes with way too much homework 3. I literally finished midterms(read: hell) yesterday and I’m just exhausted and 4. I re-write chapters too many times and I have multiple chapter drafts. FOR. EACH. ONE. Gah, any way most of them are way more awesome than what I actually post but for one reason or another aren’t exactly story material and doesn’t fit the pace or direction I want. So I’ve decided to share my half baked ideas with you all, either in a new story or under the chapters as bonus scenes and bloopers, let me know in the comments which one you guys would prefer. I’ll post my first one underneath this note, it starts from something you guys already read to… eh you’ll see anyway enjoy guys! Till next time.**

 

* * *

 

 

He could tell she was fidgeting, growing antsier with every moment he sat in silence, mouth still on the warm brim, slightly smirking at her discomfort.

 

Finally the blonde gave in and asked the question, just like he knew she would, words spilling out impatiently,“...well? How is it?”

 

Sasuke sighed, “Regardless of how it tastes you didn’t complete the task I gave you.”

 

Naruto scowled, arms crossing defensively in front of her, “Are you serious? I gave you better than just coffee grinds, I made you a bloody cup of _coffee_!”

 

“But I didn’t ask for a cup of coffee, did I? I asked for grinds.” He said stubbornly.

 

“What? So you were going to drink coffee grinds?”

 

“. . .think about that question for a second, I’m sure you’ll figure out how much more of an idiot that made you sound.”

 

“Baka! It’s called sarcasm, it’s a form of humor, not that _you_ would know anything about that.” Naruto huffed.

 

“I don’t have to prove myself to you.” Sasuke grouchily remarked. He could be funny when he wanted to be. And he knew tons of jokes like that great one, about… about...the chicken and the road! Priceless.

 

“Uhn, you keep believing that,” Naruto shifted her eyes over and pointedly looked him up and down, raising an eyebrow, “More like funny looking.”

 

Sasuke rolled his eyes, so now they were resorting to _that_. He knew that was nothing more than her jealousy talking because countless confessions he’d received said otherwise.

 

“-I mean seriously that hair..” Apparently she hadn’t stopped with her comments.

 

His eyebrow twitched, “What about my hair?”

 

Naruto smirked smugly, savoring the moment, “You mean no one ever told you?”

 

The Uchiha scowled, “Told me what?”

 

“That your hair looks like a duck’s ass, yeesh why did you think I was calling you that?”

 

“My hair _does not_ look like a duck’s ass.”

 

“Yes it does…”

 

“No it doesn’t!”

 

“Yes it does…”

 

“No it-” Sasuke trailed off as his eyes landed on the person wiping down the tables, a good distance away, “Hey, you!”

 

The man looked up, head whipping around both ways in confusion, trying to see who spoke, before landing on Sasuke, pointing to himself as if to say, _Who me?_

 

“Does my hair look like a duck ass?”

 

He turned around presenting the back of his head to the man for observation.

 

“W-well, the shape is um...unique and some might be of the opinion that um…”

 

“That what?” Sasuke glared at the man, _why couldn’t he just say what he thought?_

The man shrunk back a bit.

 

“Sasuke stop looking at him like that dammit, you’re glaring the poor guy into submission.” Naruto commented from behind his shoulder.

 

He eased up on the intensity of the glare and was satisfied to see the man visibly regaining a backbone.

 

The man spoke again, this time more confident and firm, “Sorry, it looks like a duck ass.”

  


The wild cackling behind him after the remark made him narrow his eyes.

He couldn’t make out any words aside from “Duck Ass” and “Donald Duck would be jealous”.

 

Sasuke eyed her weirdly from where she was shaking with laughter,  desperately clinging on to a seat, in an effort to keep herself balanced.

 

What went through that woman’s mind, he didn’t want to know.

 

“Dobe you can stop laughing now.”

 

The laughter only grew louder and the cleaner uncomfortably excused himself.

 

Sasuke sighed for the umpteenth time that day. He seemed to be doing that a lot.

 

Even amongst the glaring lights of downtown Konoha, Naruto stood out. Especially that orange hoodie of hers. Sasuke’s black hoodie and leather jacket were much more suited to blend in with the growing evening shadows.

 

“I’d say I’m sorry about earlier, but I’m really not. Seriously, how could you not know?”

 

“Hn.”

 

She gave him a side eye, “So we’re back to monosyllabic answers huh?”

 

“Hn.”

 

“It’s fine, it’s sort of like a language isn’t it. The difference between ‘hn’ and ‘hN’ is apparent until you actually learn the language.”

 

He raised an eyebrow at that explanation, he hadn’t thought about it like that. It was just a thing all Uchihas did and understood.

 

“I’m going to learn it believe it!”

 

“Hn.”

 

“I will okay? Stop doubting me.”

 

People walking passed gave them strange looks. Naruto couldn’t blame them, without any context this conversation must look ridiculous.

 

But honestly she didn’t care.

 

“...do you like ramen?” Came the innocent question.

 

“It’s okay, I don’t eat it much.”

 

The footsteps that were in pace with his, stopped.

 

Sasuke sighed and turned around, shifting his weight as he prepared for another one of her weird food moments.

 

Her blue eyes were widened with shock and pity. _Why the hell was she pitying him?_

She took a step forward, and then another and another and another until she was right in front of him.

 

Naruto looked sadly at him, “I understand now, you poor, poor soul.” And then she hugged him.

 

Sasuke was stone still. Then-

“Get off of me you dobe!”

 

“No! I understand your cold exterior now, your need to filled the ramen shape hole in your soul with teme-ness. You don’t have to live like this!” She said sympathetically, clinging onto him like a koala, despite his efforts.

 

“Stop trying to psychoanalyse me and let. GO!”

 

Finally she let go, Sasuke glaring, the mega watt version that had passersby cringing, “It’s okay Sasuke. I know just the thing...”

 

“Shut up, let’s just grab the old hag’s sake and go back.”

 

“Okay, okay...after you have ramen.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	5. Karma is a B

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snakeu, one eye guy, cry cry and drive bys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Confession: This chapter has been done since March...but i forgot to update it on here *sweatdrops*
> 
> Theres a little blooper that didnt make the cut for this chapter at the bottom for you guys. I might include it in a later chapter if it fits though. 
> 
> R&R and hope you like it!

 

* * *

 

 

 

“ ‘scuse me!” She was racing. Swerving through startled pedestrians, hair flying behind her like a blonde streamer, beat up orange messenger bag, (a graduation gift from Kakashi) bouncing against her hips. The thumping grew faster and more consistent as she turned on another burst of speed _because she was late._

 

_Goddammit, Sasuke was going to kill her. Even worse, Tsunade would kill her, revive her to make watch her death and then...kill her again._

 

 _Stupid classes._ Her mind flashed back to earlier this afternoon.

 

She had dozed off somewhere between how affection stimulates the brain and the psychology of love- more towards the end of that second one.

 

The fact that it was Mr. Ibiki delivering the lecture made it hard to actually pay attention, especially since she just couldn’t take him seriously. It was commonly believed he was previously some sort of interrogator, because like countless scared witless students could tell you, he had ways of making you confess the truth without even saying a word.

 

Standing up there with his black bandana, heavy set eyes glinting with a poorly masked sadistic sparkle and grim mouth in a harsh straight line, talking about how the mind “came alive in a glorious symphony of emotions” really destroyed that image. So yeah, she fell asleep, nothing too major, maybe Hinata would have the notes and as a thank you she’d take them to that one movie the Hyuuga was going crazy about.

 

At least that was what she thought until she was “volunteered” go assist Professor Orochimaru with his… experiments.

 

She had walked out of the room and began to make her way down the hall, but her professor’s voice had stopped her from moving forwards, “ You forgot this,” Ibiki said holding up her orange bag. As she reached to grab it, his hand snatched a paper that had fell on the floor, examining it.

 

“What do you know. . .your handwriting has suddenly become more legible since last night’s assignment. . .” his dark eyes glinted, “ It almost looks like Hinata’s as a matter of fact.”

 

Her mouth opened to protest as he tucked the paper inside his trench coat, “Don’t worry. . . I’ll return this to her.”

 

He had walked back into the classroom and started to close the door, pausing when only a crack remained, “And Naruto, I hope you’ll be ready for the quiz next class.” And then slammed the door in her face causing a gust of wind to blow her hair into her face. Strands of golden hair blew into her mouth.

 

Naruto scowled as she remembered the incident.

 

To be honest, she didn’t know much about the man. Rumors of course, floated around the campus, carried by the whispers of failed students and janitorial workers, who told tales of dark corners, eerie green lights, and the faint hisses of snakes that lingered in the walls of the old brick building.

 

Through the same rumor mill,  she’d also heard that Jiraiya had once been a monk.

Obviously the credibility was lacking because Jiraiya’s interest in the woman human body was anything but spiritual.

 

After serving the rest of her class time there, from 2:00-3:30, she’d learned an important lesson- unlike some places, Konoha College’s rumors just weren’t worth listening to.

 

* * *

 

“Pass me petri dish number 35.” A pale hand reached out expectantly for the requested item.

 

“On it!” The call came from the other side of the room, where the newly dubbed lab assistant jogged over. She had been inspecting the snakes behind the 18 foot enclosure, but now she ran over to the industrial sized fridge that contained petri dishes 1-50.  

 

Within a few moments she had the object and placed it in his hand.

 

He hummed, a sound that could be taken multiple ways, but Naruto recognized it for what it really was- appreciation. Spending time with people who rarely said what they meant had taught her to close read between the lines.

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

Slanted golden eyes looked down at her for a moment, emotionless and calculating,

 

“... you’re an odd girl, did you know that?”

 

Naruto swayed on her heels for a moment, thinking of her response, “I prefer remarkable, but that works too.”

 

He stared at her for a moment longer before returning back to his work under a small UV lamp, but not before she caught the smirk that threatened to escape straight, thin lips.

 

Naruto however, did allow a genuine smile to flourish on her face. He was an alright guy, nothing like how the rumors had painted the professor to be… just _really_ socially constipated, and somewhat obsessed with snakes.

 

She could handle that.

 

Orochimaru must’ve felt her smile, and met his emotional quotia of the day, because he turned back around with a scowl on his face, “What are you doing standing there? The snakes still need feeding, and then I need you to collect scales from specimen 4,” He stopped abruptly, narrowing his eyes as he said, “You do know how to do that right?”

 

“Nope. I’m a psychology major.” She stuffed her hands in her lab coat, marvelling at how big the pockets were.

 

He sighed, just barely though, no more than a puff of air, spinning on his heel, causing his black hair to whip behind him like a shortened cape, stalking off to the enclosure. Calling over his shoulder he said, his voice revealing his impatience, “Any time in the next century.”

 

Naruto was wondering how his hair didn’t have any white yet.

 

She snorted. _His brand of vanity was probably the kind that didn’t mind using L’oreal ‘Ebony’ to cover any inconsistencies the years may have caused._

 

“Yes your highness.” She grumbled following after him.

 

“What was that?” Dammit, she’d have to be careful around his bat ears.

 

“Nothing!”

 

And so Naruto learned how to handle snakes. It was actually really cool, and she had more fun than she ever had in high school Bio. Maybe it was because she had never liked the idea of dissecting something. It made her feel like she was disrespecting the life it had lived, even if it was “just an animal”.

 

It might also be worth it to mention that as she had packed up her bag, belatedly realizing the amount of time that had passed and the fact she had 10 minutes to be halfway across the city without a ride,  she was halted.

 

Her hand had been on the doorknob of the biology lab, about to open it before a gust of wind had stopped her and caused her to look back. Right at the sight of the white lab coat she had returned just minutes ago, flying towards her. Naruto had recovered quickly, catching it smoothly, and staring down at it in confusion before looking up at the ageless man who stood before her. His face showed no sign of acknowledge what he was saying. Just indifference.

 

“2:00 p.m. sharp. The snakes need feeding.”

 

Her face broke out into an excited grin before morphing into a sly one, innocently recycling his words from earlier,

 

“You’re a big softie gramps, you know that?” She hurried out of the room, aware that she’d left him in muted confusion, “Don’t worry,  your secret’s safe with me.”.

 

As she exited the doors of the college, her hand found its way to the pocket of the coat, and a piece of paper exited as well.

 

 _Course Transfer Recommendation:_ **_Biology_ **

_Student:_ **_Naruto Uzumaki_ **

_Year:_ **_Undergraduate Year 1_ **

 

 _Recommended by:_ **_Orochimaru Sannin_ **

 

She stopped for a moment to shake her head with a small smile.

 

_Damn, the feared Professor was a big cream puff after all._

 

Take that Ibiki.

 

* * *

 

She’d enjoyed her time in the lab, but somehow she didn’t think the barista waiting for her behind the counter would care.

 

Finally, the cafe came within view.

 

She decided to used the last few sidewalk blocks to collect her thoughts, and maybe, _maybe,_ come up with something to say that sounded better than, “I prefer the company of snakes and socially inept 50 year olds over yours.”

 

Pushing open the doors, familiar scents and sounds flooded her senses, each fighting for her unwavering attention. Her eyes were drawn to the man behind the register, scowling at the customer who was currently ordering.

 

Well, not exactly scowling, but she could tell he was pissed, the tension in his shoulders betraying it.

 

Maybe she could sneak into the staff room and change discretely before he noticed?

 

His accusatory eyes put a stop to that idea.

 

She grinned sheepishly, shrugging her shoulders, and motioning to her bag, in a _what can you do?_ motion.

 

They narrowed even further and Naruto slunk her way to the employee room.

 

She shrugged her bag onto the floor, and opened her locker, pulling out her uniform. She quickly changed into the standard black skinny jeans and white Konoha Coffee t-shirt employees wore, before tying an apron around her waist. After pausing a moment, she rummaged through her bag and grabbed an orange bandana and a scrunchy, tying it around her forehead and gathering her blonde hair into a ponytail. Naruto struggled to put her bag into the tall locker, since the locker was easily over her 5 foot something stature. Instead, she used the neighboring desk as a step stool.

 

When she was done she took a breath, pushed the swinging door open and prepared herself for the onslaught.

 

And was pleasantly surprised when she wasn’t immediately struck by lightning.

 

Sasuke however, was not amused.

 

It was nice to know she didn’t own a watch.

 

Either that or she just couldn’t tell time and honestly, he wouldn’t put it past her. Maybe he would buy her a watch for the holidays, if only so she would be on time for once.

 

This wasn’t the first time either.

 

Thanks to her repetitive tardiness he had to deal with customers **and** make drinks, inevitably leading to a longer wait time and irritable customers. Tsunade had chewed him out last time his temper had snapped at a customer.

 

“Who spit in your coffee this morning?” Ugh, that grating voice.

 

He glared at her and she raised her hands up defensively.

“Whoa, calm down princess, ” She struggled to hold in a laugh, and Sasuke felt his scowl grow larger, “Your knight in shining blonde has arrived to rescue you from the horrors of customer service.”

 

He took a step back, content to let her take his place at the register and allow him to retreat back to the place he felt more comfortable- the counter.

 

After a couple hours, Sasuke had turned out the repetitive sound of the dobe saying in her overly cheerful voice, “Welcome to Konoha, may I take your order?”, and was already started on the order by the time she had gotten confirmation.

 

His hand slid the hot cup over the counter, it stopped a few inches from her hand, and her head turned to smile at him gratefully before turning back to the customer.

 

“Here you go, can I get you anything else with that? I recommend the cream puffs…”

 

The Uchiha didn’t think Uzumaki realized she _had_ smiled at him, it must be an automatic response or something.

 

He brushed it aside as another weird _her_ thing and went back to his work.

 

They worked surprisingly well together, and she didn’t pester him as much as he’d anticipated, aside from the occasional snide comment, and after 2 weeks of working together they’d fell into a routine.

 

“Hey teme! What’s got your head in the clouds?” Her voice was faint as she walked out from behind the counter to the front door, flipping the store sign from ‘Open’ to ‘Closed’.

 

“...”

 

At his silence she remarked, “Fine, continue on with your brooding. Sorry for interrupting.”

 

“Hn.” (Translation: I’m not brooding.)

 

“You are brooding.” A challenge twinkled in her eyes and Sasuke couldn’t help but want to _crush it_.

 

“And you won’t stop talking.”

 

The woman cocked her head, “True, but that’s just who I am. What’s your excuse? You’re Batman?”

 

He rolled his eyes at that.

 

She sat down at in one of the leather armchairs in the corner of the room and propped her feet up on a table, sinking back into the chair so far she practically became one with the chair.

 

“Teme, make me coffee.”

 

He scowled darkly, “Get your feet off the table.”

 

Naruto continued as if she didn’t hear him, “Because you may be an asshole, but your coffee is Kami’s gift to the world.”

 

Well, she had a way with words didn’t she?

 

She spoke up again, this time sweetening her voice as she attempted to bribe him,  “I’ll bake cookies next week?”

 

Lies, she had tried making some to sell during her first week, and the poor old man she had puppy dog eyed into buying one had coughed up flour from an unmixed clump.

 

“Aren’t you supposed to be locking up? It’s your day, dobe. Don’t tell me you forgot?” A blatant dismissal and conversation (could it be called that?) ender. He turned his attention to the pile of mugs that lie waiting for him.

 

“Dammit.” A sigh and a thump, probably a book, a heavy one by the sound of it, but maybe if he was lucky it was her falling out of the chair.

 

* * *

 

“BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEE-”

 

An arm was flopping around the nightstand trying to hit the demon machine trying to lure her from her warm blankets. Finally, two blue, sleepy eyes, framed with a messy bedhead, peered out from amidst wrinkled sheets. The clock looked back at her, announcing the time in bold, red numbers: 10:00 a.m.

 

What time had he said to meet? 9:00 a.m?

 

Her eyes felt as if the weight of the world were pulling them down. She tried to flutter them in an effort to stay awake long enough to finish her train of thought.

 

Eh, she had another 2 hours before she had to be there then, and it only took her 10 minutes to get out of the house. Cool.

 

The world faded to black.

 

* * *

 

She was right.

 

2 hours later and he still hadn’t shown up at their meeting spot. Naruto kept busy by reading a textbook loaned to her by Orochimaru on cell regeneration.

 

“Be careful, wouldn’t want to strain that brain of yours.”

 

Naruto looked up, surprised to be interrupted before her eyes narrowed accusingly, “You’re late,” she declared.

 

The man had his hands in his pockets, hunched in a casual slouch with his one eye lazily looking at her. He shrugged, a very languid movement, just barely there. “I’m here aren’t I?”

 

Naruto really wished she could say she was surprised by the response, but really she’d come to expect and accept it. What else could you do with a person with chronic lateness?

 

“You’re the one that needs _my_ help”

 

“I disagree, I think wrapping myself up under the christmas tree would be a great present.”

 

“I refuse to let you defile Iruka’s eyes like that.”

 

They stared at each other for a moment, at an impasse, before Kakashi’s eye curved into a smile, “I suppose it is a little to early for that...maybe on the 4 month anniversary”

 

Naruto groaned, “Keep your comments PG okay, I’m practically a minor.”

 

She could feel the sly smile from underneath his surgical mask.

 

“Let’s go grab Iruka a proper present.” She stood up, placing the book in her trusty bag, before latching onto his arm and dragging his lanky form down the sidewalk.

 

“Must we do this today? Christmas isn’t even for another 3 weeks.”

 

Naruto snorted, “If I left present shopping up to you, people would get their presents during Easter.”

 

He sighed, but allowed himself to be pulled into the subway station.

 

“Nice to see you too Kakashi.”

 

* * *

 

On the other side of the city, some hours later, Sasuke was suffering through the family dinner Mikoto decided to arrange. She claimed the stoic Uchiha men needed to take time out of their schedules to reconnect and remind her they weren’t granite statues.

 

Sasuke just thought she liked to know what was going on. He couldn’t exactly fault his mother for that though- they weren’t exactly the most vocal family.

 

“Itachi, how’s your division faring?”

 

Sasuke’s hands tightened imperceptibly around his fork and knife which were cutting a piece of lasagna.  The question came from his father, Fugaku, who most definitely knew the answer to the question as he’d attended a board meeting yesterday. It was apparent to the youngest Uchiha that this was a jab towards his current position, even though _Fugaku_ was the one who made him wait.  

 

Jealousy wrapped itself around his rib cage, squeezing and constricting him, making it hard to breathe right.

 

Was he not mature enough?

 

Responsible enough?

 

What was it that made _Itachi_ more capable to take over a _company_ at _16_ than he to run a _division_ at _19_?

 

* * *

 

Mikoto looked over the table, arm reaching over to grab the bowl of salad, at her youngest son.

 

Her face didn’t reveal her thoughts on the matter, but inside her heart panged, longing to reach out to hug and protect him like she did when he was little.

 

The image of a smiling young boy with big, black eyes,

_“Kaa-chan!”_

 

Feeling her gaze on him, the man looked up to meet her eyes, guarding his thoughts.

 

Mikoto felt her stomach drop.

 

Where had her sweet child gone? She could feel him steadily drifting further and further out of her life... here she was grasping at straws, trying to keep their family, held together by scant pieces of thread, together, but that was a selfish want. After all Sasuke was almost 20, and she’d known one day he would stop being so dependent on her, but like all mothers she wished that dreaded day would never come.

 

It seemed it had though. It had crept up on her, stealing away before she had even a clue something was adrift. Or maybe she had known and had managed to convince herself otherwise.

 

It was a loathsome truth that her family could not seem to click in some semblance of the word. And unlike scars, these didn’t heal with time, instead their presence was an infection, spreading slowly, tainting what good they once had, festering, lingering long after the initial spread.

 

She had seen the first glimpses of Sasuke’s emotional turmoil as he had watched Itachi walk out of the front door. His older brother was smartly dressed in an expensive black suit, silver watch glittering on his slim wrist, leather shoes polished and shining, all at the normally tender age of 10, he was already sitting in on his first board meeting.

 

_“Why can’t I go?”_

 

It emerged again when Sasuke was applying for an internship at Uchiha Corp., choosing to go through the same process as his fellow applicants, applying based on his own merits, name unattached. He had worked for weeks on it, pulling late nights and early morning. He’d never said a word about it to anyone. Mikoto herself hadn’t know until the night Fugaku came home taking down his soaked umbrella, wet, leather briefcase glistening, face unfeeling but eyes dark. After being married to him for more than 20 years, she could recognize the look in his eyes as anger, simmering, undiluted anger.

 

He’d calmly taken off his shoes and ignored her when she reached out to take his coat instead opting to walk up the dark stained wood stairs. She’d quickly followed, an uneasy feeling flooding through her, and had been quick enough to glimpse his destination a second before the Uchiha patriarch turned the door knob opening the door to reveal Sasuke. He was sitting at his desk, earbuds in, writing something on a piece of paper, desk light shining softly on it, absolutely unaware.

 

At least until a stapled packet of paper was slammed onto his desk jolting him out of his calm.

 

Her youngest son looked up in mildly veiled confusion, tugging a dark blue earbud out, turning his swivel chair towards his father.

 

Mikoto watched from the shadows.

 

His usually controlled expression betrayed his anxiousness at seeing his application. A hand reached out to grab it and she could tell by how tightly clenched his hands looked, that the paper was going to crumple under the stress.

 

He quickly flipped past the cover page, and from her spot in the door she could read what it said.

 

**Uchiha Corp. Internship Program 20(  )-20(  )**

_Applicant Name:_ **_Sasuke Uchiha_ **

 

She held a hand to her mouth, stifling a gasp.

 

_He hadn’t told her._

 

And she watched as the excitement drained out his eyes and the glittering black turned to dull coal and her heart dropped.

 

_No._

 

“What is this.” Fugaku’s voice was low rumble.

 

Sasuke turned back to his previous position, chair moving to face the blue-grey wall.

 

When he spoke, it was flat, “My application.”

 

“Let me be clear; whether or not you applied for the program is not of concern to me,” it was blunt and cold and Mikoto wanted to rush in between them and tell them to **_stop,_ ** but she didn’t and she couldn’t because mothers couldn’t protect their children from everything, and Sasuke would never forgive her if she did.

 

He was strong, had been since he was little, _had_ to be in order to catch up Itachi. Seeing her son application in his hand, attempting to wrench some sort of validation from those he had been chasing for a long time… it made her ache that he even had to. Not to be seen as an equal, but to be _seen._ She had seen him, had always seen him, and in her eyes he had won everything he had.

 

But not in Fugaku’s eyes, never in Fugaku’s eyes.

 

“But the fact you stole your brother’s work and tried to pass it off as your own? Are you trying to damage the family name? I looked like a fool at the board meeting having my heir announce his ideas and then having the application committee member in attendance, comment that she’d seen a similar one in the applications. ”

 

Fugaku grabbed the rejected paper from Sasuke’s hands, clenching the application  too tightly, “Are you so juvenile as to ruin Itachi’s career with your pranks? Itachi will one day lead Uchiha Corp., he is our future. Don’t you care about-”

 

A harsh burst of laughter pierced the air, Sasuke was slowly shaking his head, “You don’t get it do you?” Sasuke’s voice was cold as he interrupted, “I guess that’s the problem...” He abruptly stood up, knocking over his chair as he did, brushing past his father, grabbing a jacket on his way out.

 

Mikoto reached out to brush his arm, heart breaking as he stopped and stared, face set, at her and obviously avoided her touch.

 

“Maybe I’m done with caring.”

 

Fugaku called after him still standing in the room, exasperated, as if he was dealing with a petulant child, “I wasn’t done with you young man. Come back here.”

 

“Well I am. Ask Itachi about it.”

 

And with those words she watched as he disappeared down the winding staircase. The silent air was punctuated with the distant sound of a door clicking shut.

 

The sound spoke volumes.

 

Fugaku made to go after him but Mikoto had had enough of standing on the sidelines.

 

Stepping in front of him, she looked at him with a dangerous look on her face, firmly saying, “Let him go. At the very least you owe him that, that and a phone call.”

 

She left him standing there, electing to walk up the winding stairs to the attic, a place held in isolation by the rest of the house. It was hers.

 

There she locked the door, walked over the window sill and sank spineless against the wall, navy blue dress pooling around her, grey light catching in her hair. Softly she picked up a picture sitting nearby, hand lovingly brushing off the dust to expose the snapshot that hadn’t been reality for many, many years- a happy husband and wife staring at each other, sunset in the background, clan crest hanging from a banner above.

 

She grabbed another one, tracing the cool metal frame. This one was a picture of her sons, Itachi’s beautiful black hair brushing his shoulder as he leaned forwards, fingers poking his younger brother who was glaring back, badly masked adoration underneath.

 

She smiled weakly at that.

 _When was the last time she could actually_ **_read_ ** _their faces?_

 

The wooden planks creaked as she shifted the last one to face her. Sasuke sitting on his father’s shoulders, little hands gripping his hair a little too tight judging by the grimace on Fugaku’s face. Mikoto was crouched down, hands on Itachi’s shoulders, smile lighting up her face, Itachi’s face in a toned down version of his signature blank face.

 

But they were _happy_.

 

A drop of water dropped onto the glass, a curtain of her hair hiding her from view.

 

_And it’s been so long since they were._

 

* * *

 

Mikoto broke her gaze, snapping back to the present. Her heart was weighed down, pinpricks threatened her eyes, but she had smile on her face. She rose from her seat, gracefully folding the napkin that was on her lap, placing it on the chair.

 

“If you’ll excuse me…”

 

The table rippled with low mummers of acknowledgement.

 

The walk was short and she finally released a sigh when the door closed behind her.

 

A reflection of her stared back, and she quickly looked down to avoid it, washing her face with cool water. Just breathing, trying to get control of herself. Trying to float when she was drowning.

 

_Where had she went wrong?_

 

When she came back 10 minutes later, the table was empty and the plates still full.

 

Her smile cracked.

 

* * *

 

Sasuke was glad it was over. He’d left as soon as he could, grabbing his coat and keys, leaving in a manner that clearly said he’d rather be anywhere but there.

 

The heat blew from the vents and was creating a bubble of warmth that started to relax the man’s tense form.

 

His fingers thrummed on the black leather of his steering wheel as he waited impatiently for the light to change. The crosslight flashed orange numbers, glowing brightly in the creeping dark and he lightly rested his foot on the gas in anticipation as the timer wound down.

 

Out of the corner of his eye he caught a figure, illuminated by streetlights glancing left to right, obviously about to cross despite the limited time.

 

His headlights brought the figure into view as she, they were a she, ran across the street in front of him. Sasuke saw blonde pigtails and for a moment he was reminded of an overly cheerful girl sporting the same hairstyle.

 

Probably because it was her. Hands stuffed in her obnoxiously orange hoodie pockets, carrying several bags on her wrist, and quite obviously cold despite her efforts to seem otherwise.

 

Sasuke stared at her for a moment before deciding.

 

His finger curled around the button and the passenger window was rolled down, and he found himself saying, “Dobe.”

 

She kept walking as if she hadn’t heard and he spoke again, this time louder, “Dobe.”

 

Her head twisted to look over her shoulder at the voice, and her face was a mix of confusion and annoyance, as she replied, albeit grudgingly, to the call, “Teme? What are you doing here?”

 

Sasuke suppressed the urge to roll up his window and drive away, “I’m trying to rob you.” He said flatly, “ Now get in, you’re letting the heat escape.”

 

The car behind him honked impatiently before switching lanes and driving around his black car, giving him a dirty look while passing.

 

Sasuke couldn’t care less.

 

Naruto scowled, “You could be a kidnapper for all I know, like hell I’m getting in your car.”

 

He raised an unimpressed eyebrow, “Whatever. It’s supposed to snow tonight.”

 

The Uchiha started rolling up the window, when a hand yanked open the passenger door and plopped into the seat, bags crowding the front and covering both her lap and the stick shift.

 

He glanced down at the mess before hauling her stuff in the back without another look, ignoring the sounds of protest, “Hey, be careful with that!”

 

He turned his eyes to the front and started to drive, “Was your goal to buy an entire store?”

 

She was fiddling with the seat, trying to get comfortable when she responded, “Nah, just early Christmas shopping, I was trying to make sure my brother didn’t buy gift cards for everyone like he has for the past 5 years. I keep telling him presents should be personalized.”

 

He smirked at that- it was exactly what his family did. Sasuke knew he would wake up on Christmas morning with the notification on his phone of a money transfer. The only one who still bothered with presents was his mother.

 

“Where am I going?”

 

Naruto looked at him suspiciously, “Why?”

 

“So I can stop driving around in circles like I have been for the past 2 minutes.”

 

Her mouth formed an ‘O’ as she took note of the same street corner. She then turned to glare and blew a raspberry and Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the childish move.

 

“Just take me to the night market, near Ichiraku Ramen.”

 

It should take no more than 10 minutes from where they were.

 

 _10 minutes of silence_ _if he was lucky_

 

Sasuke really should’ve known better.

 

The first minute was silence and fidgeting. Then it just stopped and Sasuke could feel eyes boring into the side of his head like bloody lasers. He wasn’t sure which one was worse, but he turned to meet the blue eyes that just looked puzzled, biting out a sharp, “What.”

 

“Something’s off about you teme.” Was the declaration.

 

He held in a sigh. Of course something was up because silence from her meant nothing good.

 

“You met me a month ago, how would you know something’s off with me.”

Because even if it was, that wasn’t her business.

 

Unbeknownst to him his shoulders tightened and his fingers started gripping the steering wheel a little harder.

 

Naruto noticed.

 

“Because something _is_ off with you. . .” She eyed him suspiciously for a moment, as if trying to figure him out but then her features shifted and Sasuke noticed the way she changed into someone more lighthearted, “Are you Sasuke’s less bastard-y clone?”

 

It was implied that she wasn’t going to push the issue and Sasuke somewhat relaxed, taking the out she gave him.

 

“You’re an idiot,” He said flatly, letting the issue of his ‘offness’  drop,“ If it was my clone then it would have the same personality as me. ”

 

Naruto twisted in her seat, “Not true! The clone would only be a physical copy of you, it wouldn’t have the same personality since it could’ve had its own experiences.”

 

The Uchiha rolled his eyes at that comment, “If all it had was my memories then theoretically it would have the same personality, possibly the same thought process.”

 

“Are you saying clones can’t be original?”

 

Did she hear herself?

 

“Yes, I am, that’s why they’re called _clones._ ”

 

“Blasphemy.”

 

“You can’t fight logic.”

 

This was a pointless conversation, why was he having it again?

 

“Agree to disagree.”

 

The silence crept in again, but it wasn’t stilted.

 

Out of the corner of his eyes he caught her curling up on the seat.

 

“If you get mud on my seat you’re paying.”

 

She grumbled quietly with her eyes closed, hood falling off, “Whatever, wake me up when we get there.”

 

Sasuke glanced at the time on the dashboard which read 7:30 pm.

 

A couple minutes later, they arrived.

 

Sasuke released the wheel and relaxed back into his seat, tilting his head, bangs falling backwards.

 

This quiet...it was nice. Being surrounded by this warmth...it was a brief reprieve from the things that waited for him.

 

Too soon it was over though, his eyes snapping open, the blaring lights of downtown temporarily blinding him, as spots floated across his vision.

 

He ran a hand through his hair. _What was the best way to wake her up?_

 

Sasuke smirked as his eyes rested on the seat controls.

 

A second later the sound of an angry woman filled the car, but the seat on top of her though prevented her from doing anything that would earn her jail time.

 

“Jerk.”

 

“Hn.” (Translation:  I try)

 

Naruto managed to push her seat back to its former position, flipping him the bird as she opened the door to let herself out. The passenger door opened and the rustling of bags, paper and plastic, lingered before the door shut once more.

 

And his payment was complete. Sasuke wondered if this good deed would make up for his abrupt departure earlier.

 

A knock on the glass drew him out of his thoughts, and as he looked over, sleepy blue eyes meeting his through the tint. She pointed downwards in an ‘open’ motion.

 

Sasuke pretended he didn’t notice and a scowl overtook her face.

 

He waited a couple more moments just to savor the mounting frustration on her features. Because he can and it’s not his fault that she overreacts or that it’s amusing.

 

Lazily, he pushed the button and the window slid down.

 

“Nice to see you’re talking to us mere mortals again,” the dobe huffed, before conflict fluttered over her face,  her eyes were concentrating on something above her and a huff of breath escaped before twin blue irises flicked back to his.

Obviously a decision had been made.

 

She muttered something but he didn’t catch it.

 

“What?”

 

“I said,” And her voice trailed off again.

 

Sasuke felt a flicker of irritation. _Seriously, she never had a problem with speaking loudly before_ , “Where’s that loud voice of yours now dobe? You sound like a mouse.”

 

“I SAID THANK YOU.” Ah, there it was. “Did you hear it that time? Or did you want me to say it again?”

 

“You wouldn’t have to if you spoke up the first time.”

 

She exhaled and glared at him for a moment before her mouth started twitching, like she was trying to keep herself from showing amusement, “Asshole.”

 

“Usuratonkachi.”

 

“Usutona- what-ee?” Naruto’s forehead was scrunched together in confusion and Sasuke smirked at the bafflement, “What does that even mean?”

 

He positioned his hands on the wheel and made to roll up the window but paused, smirking,  “You tell me.”

 

And her face was disappearing behind the shade, blending in with shadows of the night, and he was starting to pull away, before calling out, “And you can’t take sick days for stupidity.”

 

“Shut up! This jacket is plenty warm!” Was called out from the street corner where the dobe was standing woefully underdressed for the weather.

 

Yeah right, the idiot was going to catch a cold in that and _Sasuke_ sure wasn’t going to take over the counter.

 

But, that wasn’t any of his business.

 

.

.

.

 

It didn’t stop him from chucking a scarf at her when she walked into work, bleary eyed and looking miserable three days later.

 

It was for his own benefit of course. After, customer service was a monster he wanted no part of.

 

* * *

 

 

**I’m going to start translating Sasuke’s “Hn”s as Naruto starts to understand him as a person better. Also on an unrelated note season 6 of Voltron...mind BLOWN and for those of you who read Lookism- I'm so done with Jihoo. He seriously pissed me off.**

 

**Blooper below**

  


Naruto’s phone buzzed.

 

 _What are you doing?_ Was the text that lined her lock screen. It was from an unknown number.

 

Quickly her fingers typed back, _Who’s asking?_

 

_It’s me dobe._

 

She scowled. How the heck did he even get her number?

 

_How’d you get my number?_

 

Gray dots flickered as Sasuke typed his response.

 

_Ways, now answer the question._

 

Naruto breathed out harshly, eyes glancing fingers flying.

 

 _Creep…._ She paused before typing out, _I’m busy._

 

_forget it then_

 

Her brow crinkled at the weird response, but she shrugged turning her phone off and picking up her chopsticks, to devour the steaming bowl of ramen in front of her.


	6. What's wrong with Secretary Uzumaki?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crazy, the sexy, and the confuddled walk into an office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A *small* creative liberty was taken with a certain character....but I'm the author so there *sticks tongue out*.

 

 

Sakura liked to think she was in a good place- for a college student. She didn’t have the biggest apartment and she had to share what little space she had with her blonde pig of a roommate Ino Yamanaka. But that was okay because Ino-pig, Sakura would grudgingly admit, had taste and had managed to make their cramped two bedroom apartment into a space that she looked forward to coming back to.

 

And at the end of the day when her eyelids felt like they were made of heavy lead, refusing to study the night’s lesson, her fingers stayed curled around an invisible pen and she couldn't even muster the strength to undress herself before flopping down onto her bed- it was nice to have something and someone waiting for her.

 

Even if it was just an apartment and a roommate that was somewhere between a rival and a friend.

 

* * *

  
  


_“Miss Haruno…”_

Somewhere at the back of Sakura’s mind, she registered a voice calling to her distantly.

 

“ _Miss Haruno...what are you-”_ It was louder this time, closer, and _annoying_ so she nuzzled her face further into her the crook of her arm, attempting to escape the grating sound.

 

 _“Miss Haruno!”_ The voice was distinctly feminine and sharp, this time accompanied by a firm shake.

 

“...lemme alone. ‘m tired.” Sakura’s brain refused to comprehend the situation, firmly keeping itself wrapped in the folds of sleep.

 

A new voice, male and soft in comparison to the former one, smoothly intervened,   _“Allow me.”_

 

The first voice suddenly became submissive, stumbling over her words to satisfy the second voice, _“It’s no problem r-really sir. Let me take care of this one.”_

 

Sakura didn’t hear the response- sleep had taken her again.

  


When she woke up her surroundings were different. The white cubicle walls of her job covered with colorful sticky notes, filled with countless memos, deadlines and to-do’s had been replaced with a stunning afternoon sky courtesy of wall to wall glass windows. She was lying on a couch, _black leather,_ she noted as she shifted and stretched as her body began to wake.

 

All in all not a bad way to wake up.  Except for the fact -her mind was starting to  catching up with her as her observations sunk in- _it was_ **_afternoon_ ** and _she was at_ **_work_ ** and the staff lounge that she _knew_ she wasn’t in _didn’t_ **_have_ ** _leather sofas._

 

Sakura internally groaned, curling herself into a small ball as she covered her face. _Oh Kami no... I’m_ **_so_ ** _fired…_

 

Anywhere else sleeping on the job wasn’t an offense punishable with being fired, but it was a different story where Uchiha Corp. was concerned. Every employee signed with the understanding that their work and behavior was held to the highest standard. Failure was seriously frowned upon.

 

She huffed lightly, warm against her cupped hands. Sakura smiled weakly to herself, _I needed this job too._

 

“Aww fuck,” She whispered to herself. _Now how was she going to pay for-_

 

Her thoughts froze and her body became rigid as the voice from before spoke,

 

“It seems I could add profanity to the list of misdemeanors as well Miss Haruno.”

 

She heard something sliding against a surface and glasses clinking against each other before the sound of heels clicking slowly began against the floor.

 

Sakura honestly didn’t want to turn around and see who it was.

 

“Along with sleeping while you’re on payroll and ignoring your superiors.” A dry laugh void of any actual humor accompanied the voice, “I must say, it is quite impressive you managed to achieve all of that in four hours when you haven’t a single mark against you in a year.” His voice was drawing closer.

 

_Shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit_

 

“One might even call that peculiar…”

 

Sakura sat up quickly and straightened her blouse and slacks. She bit her bottom lip harshly as she patted down her mussed hair and _prayed_ that the voice behind her didn’t belong to the one person who held her job in his hands.

 

“So Miss Haruno...” The voice was in front of her now, and something was placed on the table before her.

 

Sakura finally looked up, eyes taking in a dark blue china teapot, plate of sweets and several jars filled with various creamers and sweeteners, all resting on a cherry stained tray.

 

Her stomach now felt like an empty pit gazing upon it.

 

_When was the last time she ate?_

 

But she could only focus on it for so long. She steeled her nerves, squared her shoulders and met the black gaze of her boss- Itachi Uchiha.

 

“I’m giving you 5 minutes to enjoy my hospitality and give me one excellent reason why you should keep your job.”

 

The tightness in her chest loosened a bit. _He wasn’t going to blindly fire her. She had a chance to-_

 

_Get your shit together Sakura, dammit!_

 

“I’m extremely sorry sir.” Sakura began, slipping into a professional tone, the formality of it clearing her mind, “My behavior today was inexcusable, however you stated it yourself Uchiha-san, this is something I rarely do and today is the first black mark on my record. If you allow me to continue working here, it will **not** happen again.” She ended determinedly, staring into his unreadable eyes.

 

After a few seconds she started feeling as if she was being searched or studied, before he made a neutral sound and turned to the tray.

 

_Gah! That could mean literally anything!!_

 

Itachi reached out for the china cups, a pale hand placing one in front of himself and one in front of her before reaching out for the teapot and pouring a dark steaming stream of tea into each.

 

He started pouring copious amount of cream into his tea as he said, “Help yourself.”

 

Sakura was hungry, but she didn’t think she could stomach something right now with the fate of her only source of income on the line, “Ah, no thank you.”

 

Her stomach lightly complained and her boss stared blankly. Sakura flushed and quickly made her tea and grabbed a cookie to nibble on. It felt dry and tasted like cardboard in her mouth.

 

“Is that all?” His voice came emotionless, but Sakura hear a tinge of expectancy.

 

Her stomach sank. That didn't sound good, but Sakura wasn’t sure what he wanted to hear, so she said, “That is all.”

 

Then, a thought came to her, _if she was going to be fired then it couldn't hurt to ask,_

 

“Sir,” He raised an eyebrow, “if you're going to fire me, then please I’m asking that you give me a week to find a new job. I'm,” She took in a deep breath, before admitting, “I-I’m not just taking care of myself. Someone else relies on the income this job provides me with. At least give me a chance to stabilize and find somewhere else.”

 

The Uchiha stared at her with those unfathomable eyes, and she firmly stared back.

 

He opened his mouth to speak and Sakura quickly cut him off, “ If you keep me, I guarantee that I will make it worth your while. I can be one of the greatest assets this company has ever seen, and- _pardon my french sir_ \- I’ll never half-ass a job. I’ll give it my all and then some.” 

 

The man sipped his tea infused half and half and placed it back down on the saucer,

“I never said anything that implied I made a decision did I? With the way you’re defending yourself however, someone could believe I just accused you of murder,” The straight line of his mouth twitched in one corner quick enough to make Sakura question if she had imagined _amusement_ on his face.

 

“You have good work ethic, “ And, wow, if that didn’t startle her, honestly this entire _meeting_ was startling her, “not many people can handle the stress of working full-time, attending university and having a financially dependent at 22.”

 

* * *

 

Itachi slowly dragged his eyes over the woman, starting from the bottom and moving upwards in a clinical fashion, taking inventory of her thin wrists, sullen pallor and dark circles that attempted to hide behind concealer. And then he asked a question designed to tactfully probe at a weakness she unwillingly divulged, “But you’re not handling it are you?”

 

She flinched minutely, a fact that Itachi’s sharp eyes didn’t miss. Her eyes glazed over for a moment, and there he saw that he struck a nerve.

 

There was something there. Even with all of her grovelling earlier that he’d watched with cool disinterest,  he’d never seen her look more pathetic. There was no better word to describe her than pathetic, and Itachi felt pity.

 

The cold detached pity that one might feel for a struggling animal caught in the sharp jaws of something much larger than itself, mere seconds from being consumed. Quiet suffering, masked by the dignity she refused to give up, but there was only so long she could hang on.

 

He wondered how long it would take for her to snap.

 

Interesting... but it was not enough. He had scented blood in the water and now he wanted more.

 

* * *

 

_‘But you’re not handling it are you?’_

 

And Kami if that didn’t hurt.

 

A lump swelled in her throat. _A complete stranger could see more than the few people she had left._

 

Normally, a smile and a laugh could deflect questions and worries as easily as a shield. Concealer could hide the fact that she never slept more than 4 hours a night. A new diet could explain her gaunt form and small appetite. These tools protected her from unnecessary attention, from the well meaning but unwanted, assistance of friends and of distant family she used meet at max twice a year. Their actions would only be spurred on by pity.

 

 _Poor girl,_ they would say, _isn’t it just unfortunate what happened to her family, she didn’t deserve it..._  

 

No, she was fine. Sakura could manage without the interference of a perfect stranger. Let alone her boss.

 

She looked at him warily, “ I assure you that I am handling my _personal,_ ” She made sure to stress the word, subtle signaling her unwillingness for further discussion on the current subject, “situation perfectly fine. Thank you for your concern though.”

 

 **_Translation:_ ** _Screw off and stay out of my business, please and thank you._

 

Those black eyes looked passive, but Sakura could see the glint of curiosity hidden in their depths.

 

Itachi Uchiha was a genius- that was already known. A dangerous one too-  ruthless, exacting, unrelenting and utterly dominant in the dog-eat-dog world of business. However in this moment, Sakura realized that that attitude applied to more than sales.

He would not give up that easily she saw. Unknowingly, her situation had caught his interest, and now he would not be content to leave it alone.

 

She’d won the first battle, it did not make her foolish enough to believe that she’d win the forthcoming war.

 

She laughed a little inside. It was foolish to believe there _would_ be a war over such a small matter.

 

There was a pregnant silence, and the calculating nature of the conversation was broken, “Please refrain from using unsavory language in my building Miss Haruno.” _Dismissed._

 

Sakura rose from the couch, butt tingling after sitting in the same spot with clenched, tensed muscles for so long. She smoothed out her gray pants, dipped her head, pink hair falling forwards, in as small a bow as she could get away with, both accepting the statement and showing her “respect” for his presence. She quickly made her way across the room, heels clicking harshly against the tiled floor.

 

After what seemed like an eternity in a tense room, Sakura rested her hand lightly on the cool door handle, which leeched at her warmth, the metal starting to turn warm with the heat it absorbed. She turned her body halfway, legs facing the door whilst her upper body was angled in the direction of the man.

 

“And what of my job?”

 

Itachi stayed silent, the soft black of his head facing her, and after several long moments, the door clicked softly on itself.

 

Itachi sat quietly by himself, lost in deep thought, unconsciously refilling his cup with tea that he wouldn’t end up drinking. The CEO set down the pot, standing up and with several long strides he was at his desk.

 

A sole pianist’s finger found the intercom that would connect him to his secretary.

 

The voice that came in was nothing but respectful and filled with a sickening sweetness Itachi sensed was attraction years ago, but didn’t bother to replace as all the other suitable candidates presented the same attitude with slightly different faces and details, “How can I help you sir?”

 

One minute he was fine and the next Itachi’s eyes flared with sudden pain.

 

It felt as if little needles jammed themselves into every available crevice and twisted themselves deeper, seeking out his most vulnerable spots. Throughout the assault, he closed his eyes, took a deep breath, finally opening them though the pain had not gone away, staring straight ahead as the  blurred together and colorful dots exploded in his vision.

 

His voice was absolutely controlled and there was nothing in it that exposed his episode, “Secretary Uzumaki. Why don’t I have a personal assistant?”

 

 _Stab._ His eye twitched of its own accord.

 

“Sir, there currently are no positions open and in the past you have expressed disinterest in having such an employee.”

 

Itachi waited for what should be her next question. _Would you like me to open a position and screen for potential applicants?_

 

Of course it never comes. _Incompetent woman._

 

“That is in the past, Secretary Uzumaki. I want a personal assistant-”

 

She cut him off, “I’ll gather the files of some candidates I believe you’ll like, right away sir.”

 

 _Twist._ His world goes white.

 

Itachi linked his fingers together, the circulation being cut off and turning them white from the strength of his grip.

 

“No need. I already have a candidate in mind. Please transfer her to my department, make the necessary arrangements and notify her immediately. Give her the oak desk on this floor, place it across from mine,” As an afterthought he added, “and install a stocked mini fridge next to it.”

 

“...Sir, the only oak desk on this floor is my desk.”

 

The man pursed his lips and held back a sigh.

 

“That it is. Make the arrangements.”

 

There’s a forced strain in her voice the next time she answers, “Which desk am I to use then Uchiha-san?”

 

As he was talking, Itachi reached down to open the bottom drawer of his desk, hand automatically reaching to lift a slightly thick book out of it, placing it on the desk, “You won’t. After this assignment you’ve been dismissed Secretary Uzumaki. I’ve decided to merge the secretarial position and the new personal assistant position, therefore there is no longer a need for you in this department at this time. I’ve chosen to transfer you  to Human Resources as a manager, I believe you will be an excellent fit there. Please do a good job.”

 

Opening the book he lifted a small cylinder from within the hollowed pages of the book turned container, and looked at it. The orange bottle was  small and unassuming, but it would not do for anyone to stumble upon such a thing. He examined the paper wrapped around it before setting it down- he could wait the pain through.

 

Stilted silence, then acceptance, “Yes, sir. What is the applicant’s name?”

 

“Sakura Haruno.” A click signified the end of the call.

 

Itachi’s sight started to clear and his vision began to return to him in bits and pieces. The pain was starting to recede, and Itachi breathed again. His fingers began to unlace themselves before- more **_pain_ **.

 

 _Push._ Another spike of pain, and a warm liquid started to pool in his eyes, gathering and running down the ever present lines slanting from his eyes that marred his otherwise unblemished features, leaving tracks of red.

 

The man reached for the bottle, shaking out a blue pill, and taking it dry. The tablet stuck uncomfortable to his tongue and with a swallow, it made its way uncomfortably down his throat.

 

Hopefully the medication would work soon. It would be a terrible inconvenience to get blood on his papers.

 

His mouth  briefly twitched upwards as he mused at the thought of handing the paperwork to some underling, “It would only fuel the staff’s theory of my demon heritage.”

 

He let the thought amuse him for a few more moments before dismissing it. Itachi reached for a facial wipe, carefully wiped the blood away before disposing it in the trash can beside his desk, and went back to work.

 

* * *

  


“Secretary Uzumaki! Secretary Uzumaki!” A frantic voice made the woman in question stop her slightly angered stride down the wide corridor. Instead of turning around, she waited for the taller man to catch up.

 

“ _What_ is it Tobi. Can’t you see I’m busy _working_ right now?” She sniffed, taking in the almost childish look of mischief on his face, “Unlike _some_ people I’ve had the misfortune of meeting.”

 

“But I _was_ working you see, Tobi is a good boy of course,” He nodded to himself, before continuing, “Anyway Karin, can I call you that- we’re friends right?-I was at my station, when all of the sudden ‘ _beep’_ , my intercom goes off. Says it’s the big boss, so I get all itchy cause that guy is scaaa-reeyy, he gives me the jitters, I swear something’s off with that guy. Gives off an inhuman, you-can’t-touch-my-hot-self vibe you know, like can you imagine that kind of guy going to the bathroom, Itachi Uchiha certified genius pulling down his pants to take a shit. No you can’t.”

 

Secretary Uzumaki flushed a little at the thought. A bastard he may be, but he was a _sexy_ bastard. She shook her head a little, attempting to clear her mind,  red ponytail swishing with the effort.

 

She caught Tobi staring at her for a moment, silently observing before a sly smile slid onto his face, “...I can’t imagine it but _apparently_ **_you_** can….and you have before, haven’t you?”

 

At that comment her face burned brighter. “No, no you’ve got it wr-”

 

The protest spurred him on, “Oooo I didn’t know you were such a pervert Karin...saayy does Itachi know about that? That you want to kiiisss him and hold hiimm and melt that icy heart of his.”

 

People were starting to stare, slowing down as they walked by, subtly nudging each other with looks of amusement at Tobi’s antics. The office was always hungry for gossip and drama. _Even_ if it was from an unreliable source.

 

Clasping his hands together, he started to bat his eyelashes, “ _OH_ _Itachi_ I-”

 

Karin had enough. She move into his personal space and clasped her hand over his mouth, “I think that’s _enough,_ don’t you?” She hissed, eyes glinting dangerously.

 

Tobi stared down at her, dark eyes wide and blinking quickly. Karin removed her hand after she felt his mouth curve into a smile. It was unnerving. There was a weird feeling that she couldn’t decipher in the air, like her every action was being carefully observed.

 

“Or maybe I got it wrong, hmm Karin.” His voice was different, darker, deeper, more serious, and he flicked his eyes to the nonexistent space between them.

 

She quickly put distance between them, scowling fiercely, crossing her arms over her chest, “In your dreams, Tobi. Get back on topic or I’m leaving.”

 

“I think the princess doth protest too much, but as you wish…” Tobi’s voice switched yet again to something lighter and more playful, “ Anyway, that _schmexy_ devil of yours,” she looked warningly at him, and he put his hands up in mock surrender,

“called me to his office to pick up some paperwork for the chairman to look over. Boring stuff, lotsa numbers and crap. Something about the PR department too, I think, somewhere in that stack.”

 

That’s when Karin became Secretary Uzumaki, it may be her last day, but-, “Tobi, were you flipping through papers that don’t concern you?”

 

The man shrugged flippantly, carding his hand through his short hair, “It’s not like you don’t do the same thing.”

 

“That’s different, it’s my job.” _Was my job at least._

 

“Do you want to know or not Karin. Yeesh some people, no respect these days...so rude. So I was flipping through and then a splotch of _red_ caught my eye, at first I thought it was like a ketchup stain or something ya know, not a big deal. But then I was like but it’s the big boss’ papers, he’d never have something as pleblain as ketchup for a dipping sauce. He probably eats mayo with his fries or something, if he eats fries that is- do you think he eats fries Karin?- and when I went closer to it to check, it was the wrong shade of red. I think it was,” he paused, suddenly taking notice of the people listening in on the fringes of the hallway.

 

“What are you all looking at hmm?” His voice turned sharp, so vastly different from before, and people began to shift uncomfortably at the change, starting to disperse.

 

Even if Karin wouldn’t admit it aloud, sometimes it frightened her at how fast Tobi could change personalities, almost as if he was different person sometimes.

 

When the hallway had cleared out some, he turned back to her happy go lucky Tobi was back, no sign of the commanding man from before, “ I think it was _blood_.”

 

Karin snorted, “Yeah right. You made me stand here for _that._ ” She made to move past him, shifting the papers in her arms, “I’m going to get back to work before you tell me he’s some sort of assassin-ninja-terrorist guy.”

 

As she walked away, Tobi called from behind her childishly pouty voice, “Why don’t you believe me, it’s _true_ . Tobi is a _good_ boy, and good boys don’t lie.”

 

Did she ever mention how weird that quirky phrase of his was?

 

“Suure, I see it now- CEO by day, vigilante by night.”

 

“See you later then,” Tobi was waving so hard, Karin wondered if his arm would fly off, “don’t miss me too much Karin. Oh, and coffee doesn’t count as lunch, so eat something, like a pork cutlet bowl or udon noodles, oooo or how about-”

 

Secretary Uzumaki turned the corner rolling her eyes, leaving him behind. _What if it was blood though?_ If Tobi was telling the truth, then she was kind of glad to be transfered. Good luck to the next person.

 

Sakura Haruno.

 

A flash of bitterness welled up in her.

 

 _Who the hell was she? What made her so good that her Ita-_ wrong _not hers_ , _never hers,_ she corrected herself, _Uchiha-san, would replace her?_

 

Karin was competent, of this she was assured- her previous employers had never complained, had never wanted for anything and yet with him it never seemed to be enough. He rarely talked to her face to face, always calling over the intercom, which was to be expected, but the degree to which it happen almost made it seem like he was avoiding her. _Secretary Uzumaki,_ he’d say in that dulcet voice of his, _did you take care of that appointment?_ ** _Yes, would you like me to go over it with you?_** In a purely professional manner _No, just send me the details over email._ ** _Okay sir, I’ll also make a paper cop-_** _Don’t_ Static silence.

 

She had been content to just be useful to him, _but she failed._ It was right to move her to a different department, but she was also angry. So, so angry.

 

Karin sighed, _It was all in the past now anyway...at least she was a manager,_ was how she consoled herself...until she realized who that meant she was working with.

 

She groaned. _Kami give her strength to deal with Tobi._

 

Secretary Uzumaki finally arrived at her destination, where a pink haired woman- _pink hair, that’s so stupid, why did Ita- Uchiha-san want her?-_ was packing her stuff into a cardboard box.

 

“I see you already got the news Miss Haruno.” Her voice was cold.

 

At the voice Sakura looked up, a red haired woman, maybe a few years older than her was addressing her.

 

“Not officially, but I assumed that Uchiha-san would, so I decided to start packing.” Sakura scrutinized the woman as subtly as she could- which probably not very well.

 

Glasses. Red hair. Above average height, taller with heels. Narrowed eyes- _she doesn’t like me? But I’ve never met her?_ Folder in her arms- _my firing request?_

 

“Sorry, but...who are you?” Sakura curiously asked after her attempt to place the woman failed.

 

“Uchiha-san’s former secretary, Karin Uzumaki.” She replied clipped.

 

“Former?”

 

“Yes, _former_ . But you’re already aware of that aren’t you.” _Seriously, did she do something to this woman?_ “I’ve come to inform you of news in regards to your position. In effect immediately as per Uchiha-san’s orders.”

 

Sakura winced, _she’d been expecting it but...expecting being fired didn’t make it any easier_ , “I see…” She turned back to her messy desk and began to load items at a much faster pace, “I’ll clean this up quickly so you won’t have to wait long.”

 

Sakura was proud that her voice didn’t break because her throat felt like it was shrinking, a lump was forming in her throat and her eyes were beginning to sting with the pressure of unshed tears. She wouldn’t cry, she wouldn’t cry. It was a waste of tears, effort and it wouldn’t make anything better.

 

_She would not cry._

 

“May I have the firing notice? I’ll need it to alert the financial department of my final month’s pay.” Sakura needed to move on. Time to think of the next steps.

 

When she got home she would immediately start looking through the job classifieds. If she had to, she would apply for a couple fast food restaurants. Maybe she could ask Ino if she could cover a couple shifts at her family’s flower shop until she could get back onto her feet- she’d repay her as soon as she could.

 

Being lost in thought, she didn’t catch the look of befuddlement on Karin’s face, “What are you talking about? You’ve been transferred, why would you need a firing notice?”

 

Sakura froze, arms midway to placing a few files in the box, “...I’ve been what? Since when?” She stood up from her place at her chair, nearly eye level with the woman.

 

“Since now. But your responses made me believe you were already aware.” The woman bit her lip, softly exhaled and glanced sideways, “It seems I own you an apology. Two actually.”

 

The woman fixed her sharp red- _red?_ \- eyes on Sakura, “ I should’ve made sure that we were discussing the same topic- that was a professional mistake. And I may be many things, but I’m not a bitch. Not to people I haven’t even spoken to at least. You had nothing to do with the change in circumstance.”

 

Sakura smiled softly at that, “Thanks, but out of context I can see how what I said sounds. So I’ll do the same- sorry. ”

 

She extended her hand, the fingers were tipped in sea-green nail polish, “Let’s begin again shall we? I’m Karin Uzumaki, the new manager of the Human Resource department.”

 

“Nice to meet you...again” She added as an afterthought,  accepting the hand, “ I’m Sakura Haruno of somewhere in the Uchiha Corporation.”

 

Retracting her hand, the woman- no Karin- gave a little ‘oh’, before grabbing the folder tucked in the crook of her arm.

 

From behind Sakura, her computer hummed loudly. Her mini fan blew her way and lifted some of the stray hair out of her face.

 

On the exterior Sakura seemed collected and patiently waiting for the papers that would alert her of her new position, but on the inside, she had the stupidest dopey smile in existence. Hallelujah was ringing in her ears, and a choir of angels lifted her job insecure worries off of her chest, making everything seem a bit brighter.

 

Quietly, she thanked the universe, Kami, and whoever the hell was responsible for this bit of good luck and mercy- something she was usually lacking.

 

“Here, you’ve been promoted to Uchiha-san’s Personal Assistant, which comes with secretarial duties as well. In that folder, you’ll find the job description, a few of my observations that might aid you in working with Uchiha-san, and a sample daily schedule.”

 

Sakura’s head was spinning with questions, but she held them back and skimmed through the papers.

 

 **** **** **** **** **** **_Uchiha Corporation_ **

 

 **_Job position_ ** _: Personal Assistant_

 

 **_Primary Duties:_ ** _act as a first point of contact: deal with correspondence and phone calls. manage diaries and organising meetings and appointments, control access to the CEO, book and arrange travel, transport and accommodation, organising events and conferences._

 

 **_Secondary Duties:_ ** _plan the CEO days, drafting emails, other miscellaneous duties such as picking up gifts, dry cleaning, making coffee_

 

 _Goddamn, that was a lot._ It’s fine though, she could handle it. But Uchiha-san? Just this morning she was sure she was good as toast.

 

Itachi Uchiha was a curious guy. Hiring a nameless face to handle his day to day business? Sakura sure as hell wouldn’t do that- especially as a CEO. Unnecessary risk and all that.

 

Her credentials weren’t anything special either. A high school diploma, an Associate’s degree in business, and a couple stereotypical teenage jobs.  

 

Yup it was confirmed- Uchiha-san either found their discussion this morning _really_ enlightening or, more likely, he was insane. It was strange to take such an interest in someone after all.

 

Sakura looked up and smiled despite her growing unease, “Thank you. Maybe we could grab a coffee sometime?”

 

Karin raised an eyebrow, “I sincerely doubt you’ll have the time with your new job, but in the unlikely case you do- I’ll see. Good luck.” And with that final remark she walked away in the direction of the staff lounge.

 

Sakura took a breath, grabbed the black peacoat that was slung over the back of her chair, and quickly changed into a pair of shoes more suitable for walking.

 

She needed some air. Immediately. This cubicle was too small, her thoughts too large, questions piling onto each other seeking answers she did not have nor knew where to find. Her emotions were a mess- torn between elation, unease, fear, relief, and the gut-wrenching feeling that it was all a cosmic joke and everything would just be ripped

away.

 

On top of that, she was hungry and not properly caffeinated.

 

_Cafe it is._

  
  


The world outside of the office was loud. And cold.

 

Sakura flipped the collar of her coat up to hopefully protect more of her face from the cold, ducking her head down as well.

 

_It shouldn’t be hard to find a coffee shop in downtown Konoha._

 

And it wasn’t. At nearly every street corner she past there was a coffee shop. Mostly Starbucks teeming with people and excessively long lunch hour lines. Yeah, no thanks. Sakura wanted something quieter, hopefully somewhere emptier as well.

 

After 5 more minutes of walking, she was about to turn around and head back to the packed Starbucks near the office- then she saw it. Slightly hidden, tucked in between a small bookshop and a bus stop.

 

The cafe looked inviting, _warm_. It was a brick building, a small artisan cafe by the looks of it. Christmas lights were strung along the top of the doorway causing it to actually glow. There was a blackboard stand outside advertising their menu and specials. Looking inside, there were a few people, probably students, on laptops, and only a few people in line.

 

_Perfect._

 

Sakura stuffed her hands in her pockets and hastily walked towards the entrance. Her breath came out in front of her in small puffs of steam, and her boots crunched on the first snow of the season.

 

Finally she was there. She reached for the doorknob and the scent of coffee greeted her. The bell above her rang. Christmas music played in the background, a voices quietly murmured, but that didn’t stop her from hearing a female voice cheerily greet her with a slightly congested voice,

“Welcome to Konoha Coffee!”

* * *

  
**Edit:** Sorry for all the extra space. I uploaded it on my phone :)  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eid Mubarak! Kudos would be a lovely eid gift, cough cough.


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